I'd rather read Ralph Waldo Emerson's essay "Self Reliance".  It always served me well.

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/16643/16643-h/16643-h.htm

I agree your issues. Good post!

i dont afraid from
I am afraid from god's

Interesting to see this here @aggroed... in a sense, nice to see something like Byron Katie's approach here on Steemit, among all the developers, logicians and rationalists.

I did some years (more than a few) on the self-development retreat circuit, learning from this guru and that... came across Katie's work and some of her disciples along the way. I'm sure you'll get your share of guru-haters (aka Michael Shermer skeptic disciples) who'll want to shoot all this down, but not so fast!

Like all approaches, there's good and bad here. She does offer some good basic tools for conflict resolution... in essence, a more "accessible" version of Non-Violent Communication with a sprinkling of non-duality tossed in. 

From my experience, the "danger" critics bring up have mostly to do with the price of her seminars, her "school" and (as always!) the way some people go overboard on this stuff and STOP thinking for themselves. Which leads to losing your grip on reality and then people start throwing the "cult" word around.

Anyway... within reason... these are some handy tools for introspection, and for establishing healthy priorities in your life. It's basically "Don't sweat the little stuff," only better. And that's a great thing.

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I enjoyed reading the article.I look forward to seeing you.I envy you for writing a wonderful article.

Hey, nice application of the work. 

I was introduced to Byron Katie's work when I moved to Boulder, CO and began practicing qi gong. 

The author's <i>first</i> name is Byron, by the way.

A very interesting post to read. thanks for sharing @aggroed

A couple of things worth bearing in mind--the things you say to yourself are not usually "I'm such a XYZ" but "**You''re** such a XYZ", because you're actually replaying/paraphrasing things actual people -- authority figures during your childhood -- said to you. 

If you pay attention next time you scold yourself, you can probably tell from the intonation who that person was, then recall the exact situation, and answer your question in point #1 -- "Is this true?" Chances are the original (childhood) situation and your present one have nothing in common.

Second set of questions to ask: "Is my outburst helpful? Will it fix the situation? Is it kind? Is it a wild overreaction?"

 Anger is a result of fear. But you know what else is? Laughter. I've learned to substitute self-anger with self-laughter, and the results are stellar. 

Try it. 

Because when you make an error, there's always humor in it. The resulting change in your body's biochemistry will be beneficial instead of harmful.

very good reflection, is an impossible situation, you never know what decision to take and it may be that the only possible options are wrong, I tell you a situation almost the same as I happened to me in 2013, my little brother had a rare cancer, (DRST) had 3 very important surgeries, the first one removed a tumor of almost 2 kilos that had in the abdomen, in the second surgery was worse, because the cancer had wrapped the colon , it was a surgery of approximately 6 hours, where in the middle of the surgery I had stayed with some friends in the waiting room while my family went out to take a breath for the nerves, at that moment where there were no families except me the surgeon and he tells me that they have to take the anus and put a year in the pansa because the tumor took everything, the doctor asks me if he does or not, because if he did not, the rectum would not allow him to evacuate in a few weeks and he would have to It was one of the ugliest situations I had to live in, luckily at the minute we could talk to my family and decide together, but when I was asked to decide I was too, but none of the 2 options was correct but even so we had to choose one, my brother woke up from the operation and he learned that his life had changed again since he had been doing it since he had this disease, 4 months later he died, today I still wonder if we did the right thing and I'm sure not, I hope you understand, thanks for sharing

> "I want to do a good job. People count on me."

Agreed, which is one of my issues/drives/fears and in reaction or preparation for this I end up with a compulsion to have on hand all the data and conclusions prepared before the error happens and so I can instantly react to any situation or scenario in the most optimal fashion as soon as possible. However situations change from moment to moment, we are all human and we are all very changable, so gathering and collating and maintaining this procedures manual for reality and all choices is very draining.


Remember those little wheels/weights that would spin on an old engine, initially they start quite close together, then as the device spins faster they expand providing a greater restriction and flywheel effect as they expand.

I had to implement one of these in my life recently. I'm back into listening to music, eating properly again, feeling better than I have in a long time.

TLDR, enjoying my day off. <3

Thanks for deep diving for us and s haring, much love. <3 N+1 mofo.

Introspection can be a scary thing but it can also be a very powerful tool. Next time I am feeling fearful I will try this out.

***Point? Ok, Counterpoints from psychology blogs, religious blogs, anti-cult blogs, self help blogs, critic's blogs...***

***This woman is at least a con, and at most DANGEROUS to some individuals.***

Why You Should Steer Clear of Byron Katie’s “Work”
http://www.womenofgrace.com/blog/?p=10391

The Work of Byron Katie Could Accidentally Cause Problems In Psychologically Vulnerable People
http://www.new-synapse.com/aps/wordpress/?p=296

Byron Katie Is Either Going To Enlighten You Or Kill You Trying
http://guruphiliac.blogspot.com/2008/02/byron-katie-is-either-going-to.html

Byron Katie (the Work) and Eckhart Tolle Legit??
https://forum.culteducation.com/read.php?12,12906

http://mortentolboll.weebly.com/a-critique-of-byron-katie-and-her-therapeutic-technique-the-work.html

Byron Katie – Snake Oil Business?
http://www.reenagagneja.com/byron-katie-snake-oil-business/

Personal Reflections on the Harm Caused by Byron Katie, David Hawkins, and Others to Vulnerable People - Part II
http://mollystrongheart.blogspot.com/2015/02/personal-reflections-on-harm-caused-by.html

The work (Byron Katie) makes me so mad!
https://forums.psychcentral.com/psychotherapy/327711-work-byron-katie-makes-me-so-mad-3.html#post3637348

***There are plenty more to go find, an exercise left to the thinkers who stumble into this mess***

[edit] It sickens me to self vote on this platform, but in order to get this comment above all the bots less scrupulous folks use to validate themselves, I had to get this comment where it might be seen by someone for whom it could do some good. I am especially not fond of competing for your attention with bot owners who both self vote themselves and use their bots to hammer down other people's contributions to the conversation. Not cool, not classy and frankly, rather weak. Especially when, even after self voting for visibility, it still cannot beat the bots that circle jerk with their owners.