Why go back to an ex? by bethsjourney

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love · @bethsjourney · Feb 20 '18 (edited)

$0.39

Why go back to an ex?

Why do we go back to a place we left? I don’t know, I just know I did. When my values always said never go back.  

I now know it was a mistake, and why I had never done it before.  If it don’t work the first time, then why do we think it will work the second time round? 

Me being me has never totally cut off from a relationship. I have always felt a connection to the person I have been intimate with.  Maybe that’s why I have always stayed kinda friends with them.  

I find it hard to disconnect with the people I have shared a bed with. Even when I know the relationship had ended.  
I know it sounds weird, but we where so close at some point. And spoke about everything.  

An ex has just found out he has cancer. I’m supporting him through his treatment. 

I’ve been to another ex’s wedding,  after he cheated on me. I would never go back with them, because I always knew you have to keep going forward not back. !
Oh how confused am I at this time? ![D72F6266-8D09-4BA7-A189-A3CA41FC98CB.jpeg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmS9fvRAVbtSfn936v1s94RJArmKyDKk9fdCLQFcsAyzDY/D72F6266-8D09-4BA7-A189-A3CA41FC98CB.jpeg)

👍 sumayyahsaidso, didic, rachelhanson10, teo-nyx, beemillz, linkyourlife, bethsjourney, byn, jocelynlily, swmseeks, jaymesbawned, jewels3, nat5an, relationshipblog, jealousyjane, teneiced, arbitrarykitten, shawnamawna, raymondspeaks

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@beemillz · Feb 20 '18

$0.04

This post has been resteemed and upvoted.  I also started following you to see more of your work.

I do not keep in touch with any of my exes.  I don't become friends with them.  I do not trust them in any way.  They were deceitful and betrayed me.  When I gave all, they only gave some.  I'm not saying that my way is better than yours, because holding grudges and never forgiving is alot of baggage to carry around, but I am strong enough to carry that baggage.  People who don't reciprocate my loyalty, do not deserve my respect, friendship, or continued love.

👍 beemillz, bethsjourney

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@bethsjourney · Feb 20 '18

$0.03

I have always felt that holding a grudge affected me more. I have now excepted that my way only hurts me. I have only ever once returned to an intimate relationship with an ex, i now know that was a mistake. as allowing the same person to hurt you twice, well it was only me who allowed that. thanks for your input and i will follow you as you have raised an interest. thank you

👍 beemillz, bethsjourney

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@beemillz · Feb 20 '18

$0.03

We all hurt the same way, there is no right way to escape hurt.  If there was, I would be doing it and spreading the word!  Happy to have you on board.

👍 beemillz, bethsjourney

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1 reply

@byn · Feb 21 '18

I am married to a man who was once an ex. He devastated me, but in hindsight, I can see that meeting him changed me and hit at a desperately needed time in my life. 

I can relate to feeling connected to exes. Not all of them, of course (and it's been 23+ years since I *had* an ex to speak of, but I do remember still caring about people, even when we were no longer together. Being friends with them and their future partners, etc.

It helps me to write out my feelings over things like this, and I guess it helps to read it when other people do it too! I admire you for being able to step in and help your ex through cancer. That is never an easy journey for anyone and I wish you the best.

Thank you for sharing.

👍 bethsjourney

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@bethsjourney · Feb 25 '18

Thank you for reading and sharing your experience. I’m still sore after finishing the relationship. As I really thought this was the one. 

My ex whom found it he had cancer at the beginning of the year, well all I could do was to offer support and take him to appointments.  

Sharing with me you married your ex gives me some hope, and maybe I finished the relationship to soon.

👍 byn, bethsjourney

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@rachelhanson10 · Feb 20 '18

I get this too <3. I hope love and healing come to you as you work through this.

👍 bethsjourney

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@bethsjourney · Feb 20 '18

$0.12

Thank you, I will definitely learn from this mistake.

👍 rachelhanson10, bethsjourney

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@shawnamawna · Feb 20 '18

$0.06

This sounds so painful. Thank you for sharing your honest experience. I am wishing you the best as you support and heal.

👍 rachelhanson10, bethsjourney

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@bethsjourney · Feb 20 '18

thank you again, i'm so grateful I have somewhere to talk of my feeling.

👍 bethsjourney

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@steemitboard · Feb 22 '18

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@sumayyahsaidso · Feb 20 '18

$0.06

I totally understand. In my lifetime, I have returned to people who hurt me simply because they were familiar and easier to deal with than someone wholly unknown.

👍 rachelhanson10, bethsjourney

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@bethsjourney · Feb 20 '18

I'm still trying to understand myself.   I will learn to be happy on my own again. I am sure of that.

👍 bethsjourney

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