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Uphold bad by brandt

View this thread on: hive.blogpeakd.comecency.com
· @brandt ·
$20.50
Uphold bad
<code>_October 11, 2021
From: Uphold <noreply (at) uphold.com>
To: Brandt <____________ (at) protonmail.com>
Subject: 👉 We need to know you better_</code>

<hr>

![cover.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EqL5TcRnw7DqyGyhZF5by8rKTpfykVy3FucSix2VW8SB1SyYVMKtGg7FX1Ag1g7Bj41.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>OH LOOK I GOT A EMAIL FROM UPHOLD</center>

###### <center>THEY WANT TO KNOW ME BETTER THAT'S NICE</center>

<hr>

![1.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EpVCZoDo5CiWkuVtqQR6TtQw3BVv2jeWyFkfxsfCJcXQPiuXmLd2FX3tGLba9cHbKgg.jpeg)

<hr>

<code>_Please answer some easy questions - it’ll only take a minute_</code>

> _Hi Brandt,_

> _To comply with Anti Money Laundering Regulations, we need to collect a little more information about you and how you use your Uphold account. It’ll only take a minute._

> _You’ll be able to transact as soon as you’ve submitted your details._

> _Cheers,_

> _Team Uphold_

<hr>

![2.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EoptSc8SjnJfZwM7nnEaMYJZ7deGrG5RKnq2TsQSFEirfnTW2A57zrFYeNJkTmviG1F.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>OH MY GOSH MONEY LAUNDERING IS BAD</center>

###### <center>OK YES OF COURSE I WILL GIVE YOU MY DETAILS NOW</center>

###### <center>UPHOLD DOT COM LOG ON</center>

<hr>

![trail 1.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EpzxhshqhMumN7t9HTDZoRcmZv1kHKEx86hqkdCHGrYuQKKJy9kJuhV8HdxfZZgvNM6.jpeg)

<hr>

<code>_Verify it's you_</code>

> _To confirm you're trying to access your account, please check the email we just sent to ____________ (at) pm.me and follow the instructions_

<hr>

![trail 3.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EpEHozPKMtTHrRAQ3bVHShTM4tCU3pnm6PJBHcfvS9n62yCZEihkDZrb83BgKPudLYL.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>IT'S ME I PROMISE JUST TRYING TO GIVE YOU MY DETAILS</center>

###### <center>SO YOU CAN KNOW ME BETTER</center>

<hr>

![3.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EopupXz2h1FsizqcQbUUjTDJjvAUjVCuYrPPfiH1EXU1uYR9hPzqMG2vh87DHgu25yq.jpeg)

<hr>

<code>_October 11, 2021
From: Uphold <noreply (at) uphold.com>
To: Brandt <____________ (at) protonmail.com>
Subject: Did you just try to sign in?_</code>

<code>_Please confirm it’s you_</code>

> _Hi Brandt,_

> _We see that you recently tried to sign in from a new device, IP address, or a different location. As a security measure, we need to confirm it’s you before you can access your account._

> _Cheers,_

> _Team Uphold_

<hr>

![4.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EokdfJtAoCauBs3gWc1uLRiUwqGbTyfEo8Tm9ZxAcRGmuJeZf6UHnmihyvqqffBiN5K.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>YES THAT WAS ME I HEREBY CONFIRM IT</center>

###### <center>I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU MY DETAILS PLEASE</center>

<hr>

![trail 4.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/Ep7u4PJvpfcNRHzJi2GnJdUobNoJNAHPH8KVzoXVtFTyfJuDpxWhBadorpR3VSsACoM.jpeg)

<hr>

<code>_We need to know you better_</code>

> _To comply with Anti-Money Laundering Regulations, we're required to collect a little more information about you. It'll only take a minute. We'll restore full account functionality once you've done this._

<br>

###### <center>OK YOU ALREADY SAID THAT</center>

###### <center>OK LET'S DO THIS</center>

<hr>

<code>_How will you use Uphold?_</code>

> _Please select from the activities below._

> _Trade cryptocurrencies_
> _Metals or Commodities investing_
> _Currency conversion_
> _Deposit or withdraw cryptocurrencies_
> _Transfers between users_

<br>

###### <center>OH THAT'S EASY</center>

###### <center>_SELECT ALL_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

<hr>

<code>_Financial Information_</code>

> _Select source of funds_

> _Salary_
> _Profits from owned business_
> _Loan_
> _Inheritance_
> _Other_

<br>

###### <center>OH MAN THIS FEELS SO GOOD</center>

###### <center>_SELECT OTHER_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

<hr>

<code>_Main source of income:
Enter your 'other' source of funds_</code>

> _E.g. Mining_

<br>

###### <center>I'M SO FLATTERED YOU ACTUALLY CARE</center>

###### <center>_ENTER BANK ROBBERY_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

<hr>

<code>_Annual income:
Amount you earn approximately_</code>

<br>

###### <center>NOT SURE TBH BUT IT'S A LOT</center>

###### <center>_ENTER 1,000,000,000,000_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

<hr>

<code>_Expected annual deposits:
Amount you expect to deposit on Uphold_</code>

<br>

###### <center>NOT SURE TBH BUT PROBABLY NOT MUCH</center>

###### <center>_ENTER 1_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

<hr>

<code>_Employment Status_</code>

> _Employed_
> _Self-employed_
> _Retired_
> _Unemployed_
> _Student_

<br>

###### <center>I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN BY EMPLOYMENT</center>

###### <center>_SELECT UNEMPLOYED_</center>

###### <center>_NEXT_</center>

###### <center>…</center>

###### <center>…</center>

###### <center>…</center>

<hr>

![cabin 1.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/EpvgWTDzd9SZD4TTPEk3e9FwatPbRfRY3bWatWdA3VXcvKozx2GhMgZyE1fgon4PR6b.jpeg)

<hr>

![cabin 2.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/Eq35ZwpFi8UaSx2U6n1LEcareUGkD2zJVzaX2fBRF59K7ZTT3E4koM5XKDmEPapBpp3.jpeg)

<hr>

![cabin 3.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/Epvgu3nRzDBq8NjyYkgkd1gP7N98UNTs2sh5dokfX164N8sn8uxp1EZ1KhoKRw5aofi.jpeg)

<hr>

![cabin 4.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/Eokd5CaqGLs7E69B1a1NjQ1gtqWsTxpCVXoBPGvAbsgqVZDuhEPJLbtuJPzNahpuSDn.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>…</center>

###### <center>…</center>

###### <center>…</center>

<br>

Oh. Well now. Looks like Uphold just restored full account access for me. How about that. 

All I had to do was lie about all of my details, and they let me right back in, just like that. 

I am now officially an unemployed bank robber who makes $1 trillion a year.

Maybe Uphold isn't so bad after all?

_Nah, what the hell am I talking about…_

They'll figure it out soon enough and restrict my account again.

I haven't relied on Uphold for a couple years now, so I don't really care.

But I'm a little bit worried.

I live entirely off of my crypto investments, so it's crucial for me to have easy and fast avenues from crypto to fiat. 

If I could actually buy the things I need with crypto then this would be a non-issue, but I live in a country that hates crypto and is rapidly approaching full-blown authoritarianism. 

_That's right, the land of the "free" and the "American dream"._

If I run out of avenues from crypto to fiat, I'm not sure what I'll do.

I used to use Binance to convert everything into BTC which I would then send to my Cash App, sell for fiat, and deposit instantly to my bank account. But Binance recently [caved to regulators](https://peakd.com/hive-150329/@brandt/binance-bad) and now I can't even use their platform with a VPN. Thank all the gods for [Mandala](https://www.mandala.exchange/). And Cash App is still an option, at least for now.

But what happens if I lose access to Mandala and/or Cash App?

Where do I go next?

LocalBitcoins, maybe?

I don't know.

What I do know is that I'm about as close to outlaw territory as you can get, without actually being an outlaw.

All outlaws are created by the state. Without law, you cannot have an outlaw. And with law, you are only asking for resistance and lawlessness. 

I am a peaceful man but my point is, if I wake up one day to find that all of my avenues have been blockaded, I will make ends meet however I see fit, and if my way of surviving disagrees with the state and the law, 

the blood will be on their hands, 

not mine.

<hr>

![view.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/brandt/245cTuDA9SiY7n6y7Ay1W4nHqGWj9E8rPkn5N6UVJaTXBUjir5Qnk3SaZx7Ds3XDcDQT8.jpeg)

<hr>

###### <center>_So, how do YOU get from crypto to fiat? Serious question, asking for an outlaw friend._</center>

<hr>

<center>※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※</center>

<center>⛰💰 💀</center>

<center>※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※</center>

<hr>

<center><sub>_10-12-21. Hey @otherbrandt I'll trade you this car I definitely didn't steal for ten grand cash._</sub></center>
👍  , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and 158 others
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vote details (222)
@dandays ·
$0.03
That was F'ing hilarious. I laughed a little more with each response and none were controllable. Not just two ha's, I'm talkin like three.
https://build-basic.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/Blog-Step-by-Step-Line-200.png
I had a difficult time trading after Binance. Bittrex kicked me out Dec 2019. I was unable to trade until just recently at KuCoin. I'll tell you the trick I did that bypassed ID and worked if you're unable trade.

Swapping I do at crypto.com. I hold my stable Coin there and draw interest. I have a trick that worked there too if you need in.

Crypto to fiat, I go to CashApp. BitPay is another option but my card expired and they've since added some extensive KYC so I split.

In Knoxville, I swear there's an ATM in every station and liquor market now, they're everywhere. I've checked several, they're consistent, you can withdraw up to $250 with just a message number.

Hope this helps.
👍  ,
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vote details (2)
@brandt ·
Glad you found it f'ing hilarious :) _My work here is done_

Sounds like we need to talk off chain… Discord maybe? 

brandt#1284

!PIZZA
👍  
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vote details (1)
@gangstalking ·
Electronic-terrorism, voice to skull and neuro monitoring on Hive and Steem. You can ignore this, but your going to wish you didnt soon. This is happening whether you believe it or not. https://ecency.com/fyrstikken/@fairandbalanced/i-am-the-only-motherfucker-on-the-internet-pointing-to-a-direct-source-for-voice-to-skull-electronic-terrorism
👎  
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vote details (1)
@nikv ·
$0.03
So glad I don't live in USA. 
Although, I have to trade in Binance or Bittrex, then take my funds to Luno to get to my local currency. Bittrex charges set fees to withdraw and they are eye-watering and I just got suspended by Binance because they didn't accept my old ID and I have to get a new ID card to be able to trade again. Getting an ID card here is not for the faint-hearted, meh
👍  
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vote details (1)
@brandt ·
Yeah Mandala's fees are the same as Binance, pretty hefty so I try not to withdraw too frequently. I got kicked out of Bittrex because I refused to do their KYC.

!PIZZA
👍  
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vote details (1)
@nikv ·
Thanks for the Pizza! Yes I also have to ensure that the amounts I withdraw are justifiable against the fees
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@pizzabot ·
@brandt, sorry! You need more to stake more $PIZZA to use this command.

The minimum requirement is 20.0 PIZZA staked.

More $PIZZA is available from [Hive-Engine](https://hive-engine.com/?p=market&t=PIZZA) or [Tribaldex](https://tribaldex.com/trade/PIZZA)
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@nineclaws ·
$0.03
>I am a peaceful man but my point is, if I wake up one day to find that all of my avenues have been blockaded, I will make ends meet however I see fit, and if my way of surviving disagrees with the state and the law,
the blood will be on their hands,
not mine.

So well put, *chuckles heartily*. 😁
👍  
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vote details (1)
@brandt ·
Thanks 😁

_Cue bad guy music_

!PIZZA
👍  
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vote details (1)
@nineclaws ·
I can't argue when I'm on the same page.

*Turns up the bad guy music*
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@pixelfan ·
$0.03
I use Kraken to covert to fiat...but of course, I don't live in usa...
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@brandt ·
I will look into Kraken, maybe they can still be tricked with a VPN :)

!PIZZA
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@pizzabot · (edited)
RE: Uphold bad
<center>PIZZA! PIZZA! PIZZA! PIZZA! PIZZA! 
PIZZA Holders sent <strong>$PIZZA</strong> tips in this post's comments:
brandt tipped preparedwombat (x1)
@brandt<sub>(3/10)</sub> tipped @nineclaws (x1)
brandt tipped dandays (x1)
brandt tipped pixelfan (x1)
brandt tipped nikv (x1)
<sub>Learn more at https://hive.pizza.</sub></center>
properties (22)
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@preparedwombat ·
$0.03
Some precious metals dealers accept crypto. Buy metal and sell it at a coin shop? Of course, they just want to see your driver’s license for their reporting requirements……
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@brandt ·
Hmm I didn't know metals dealers would take crypto. That is an interesting option. Pretty sure I know where to find metals buyers who won't give a fuck about IDs :) 

!PIZZA
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@preparedwombat · (edited)
$0.03
I know that sdbullion.com takes at least Bitcoin. If you asked the #silvergoldstackers community, they could probably point you to other dealers who accept crypto for bullion.
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)