In 2 days is my birthday. 
I cat handle days all thigs I need to do. Since the thing that happened to Nevena, the thing that has nothing to do with me, I still cant figure myself out. 
I am super tired, I fall asleep at 3 am wake up at 6:30 am, go to work, and there is nothing to do at work, is feeling useless, and not able to do anything, sleep a little because I am tired, go back home, then just fall on the bed and sleep until 9pm, wake up, do nothing, just breathing, then go to bed and cant fall asleep until 3 am and repeat for 3 weeks now straight.

I thing about my brain and how it thinks and I just hate how it works and process the infos, hate how destructive it is, how it then gets a lot more into a my life and how it just destroys everything going on and I need to figure it out before I really ruins my life, and yes, I am in PMS so then why I am ultra sensitive today. Kinda wonna cry.

I deleted my hall schedule, because of he shift I keep changing and because of the thing I actually dont do. 

Can you help me with motivating myself,  how can I be better to myself.

![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmRrPcdRdhbGT5KVNkQNDdCsKMk6GQgRfFknXLFjZYAcrE/img_5970.jpg)

Little fella hanging on my hand 

![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmfRuZYg5mpGmXVna7xkQjcHRhF6mtbpu4oquRRqBSvQsk/img_5862.jpg)

![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmY1APx77JVy1i5DpSb7sBr64NJ1FNKacsTsrdHE2yYuoM/img_5855.jpg)

![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmSVm6cLKFKyb2atMBrxLNrs8PEk5K5Pw1NzeEnSums4Zu/img_5971.jpg)