I've been writing some finance and token stuff for the past few hours, I only had a several hundred of words on the screen. I kept on writing, and the idea kept on getting disrupted. I felt pretty damn pissed about it, the whole piece of my writing doesn't jive at all, doesn't look good. I'm afraid if I let my post get broadcast on the blockchain, I think I'm going to be so screwed that I may probably lost followers. So, in order to set me away from being a super asshole that is trying to milk the system, I decided to do a freewrite.

Sometimes, it's not like we wanted to committing to things that looks bigger than our head. It just so happen, life treated us this way. I have always been doing my post, especially in 2019, I managed to publish at least 1 post a day for the whole year, at some of the days I did up to maximum of 5 posts a day, but it doesn't do me like that anymore. I'm so stuck with my job nowadays as the finance industry changed, even if I wanted to go for a new job interview, the new company could send a copy of employee screeening to my current company and obtain information from my current company. Automatically, my current company would know I'm heading out to get a job. So, what if I screwed up? I will be so screwed, a house that still need me to pay monthly for the hire purchase deal that cost probably some of people's household.

You see, it's not my choice to work so hard and left out the fun of blogging. I still love blogging, I still love to write. But my job now, especially insurance industries currently facing one of the biggest challenge due to detariffication(we call it liberization), and some company still profitable, they get to choose to reduce price. My company, has not much choice but to increase price. When that happen, seriously I think my top management guy misunderstand, they think if we increase the pricing, we will be collecting more premium. Matter of fact, customer will make comparison between different insurer's quotation and make their final decision. Sometimes doing a car insurance feels like getting scolded half an hour for absolutely not my fault. So, it is tough.

If there's a competition that everybody roast their current company and employee, I think that will be a very fun event. Sorry to have kept you reading my rubbish rant on my damn job, but seriously I found I'm pretty much going to be jobless soon as the pressure had become unbearable now, I just felt like letting it out so I won't feel that suicidal anymore, even night time at home, I'm getting messages and they're related to work. I felt helpless about it, and yes literally I just want to enjoy a few minutes of writing and let it all out.