I am in pain...

I am too fat...

But the pain is reducing after a week of frantic exercise...

I have been attending my water aerobic classes sporadically, but when the scale recently told me the magnitude of the disaster when I stood on it, I knew things had to change, and fast.

![clem splash.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmeAqzQzxyUM8urhUsHCBMpszWXig6nPrek4ZUEeR6qnLN/clem%20splash.jpg)

It is said that a definition of insanity can be stated as: "Hoping for a result that is different to previous results while doing the same thing repeatedly"

So I am doing something more...

Last week I decided to take my squash kit along to the water aerobics class for afterwards. Just to knock the ball around a bit, the game of squash requires a different kind of movement. So when I got to court, I was hitting the ball against the front wall while huffing like an angry Sea-lion confronting a rival. A fellow introduces himself to me and asks if he can join me for a bit of a knock around. Of course I agree to his proposal. After a while of course we have to play a game or two, or three... I know I am in trouble. I have not played seriously, or even casually since 2015 when I was diagnosed with a tumour in my upper spine.

All those medical dramas are over now and the tumour is gone. A few months ago when I saw the Neurosurgeon for my most recent MRI, he said I can play some casual squash. Here I must confess that I did intimate that I would just knock the ball around by myself or play my youngest daughter who has some aspirations of learning how to play the game. Not too sure if the Neurosurgeon would approve of my scale of intended improvement . So we played and I suffered greatly. My Foe on the court is a Cunning fellow who gives me just enough points to keep me trying. I was pleased to see that my pulse got into the early 150's.

Squash is certainly different now as compared to when I played it previously before the tumour.  Now days I am having to play with an extra twelve 1 kilo margarine tubs strapped around my belly. I creaked around the house and office the following day.

Then the following night a repeat. The bones and muscles were really creaking but I was starting to anticipate the movement of the squash ball much better. However, the Cunning Foe just upped his game a bit more to keep the puffing whale interested in using maximum effort. The pulse got into the mid 140's. I was pleased. Yet after the game, my creaking bones creaked louder. Yep, squash is here to stay.

"Fortunately" the following evening I had an appointment, so my body was able to recover a bit.

Then we played again on Saturday when a group of us got together in the morning. It was great fun, movement improving rapidly, probably due to getting my anticipation going.

![clem squash.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmdPybUt5Lq1CCC6cpwfdecTMECocdP8ngAxcJNvcELHKf/clem%20squash.jpg)
(what sight awaited my foes on Saturday)

The Youngest of mine has started to bleat in complaint. How she has been abandoned by her father, as soon as he has some new boyfriends to play squash with (maximum guilt being pressured against me). My response was that we still have our normally scheduled game on Friday afternoon. "Cant play, going out with friends to an amusement park" was the response. What a cheek! She can "drop" me at a moment's notice but not the other way round? The kids of today.

Wife and the Youngest berated me for trying to "kill myself", why do I always overdo things? No fear of that girls, I value my hide too much. If I feel myself battling to breathe, then I know it is time to back off.

As I mentioned earlier I have put on too much weight. The culprit is the size of my appetite, when my mouth gets going, the food disappears (rapidly). The key enemies are starches and sugars. I have pretty much sorted out the sugar, but Starch, my dearest friend, how I am going to miss you. I must drink more water! Horrible stuff, hate it, I feel sorry for Father Adam, I am sure he would have enjoyed some of our nice fizzy drinks today, even if they are "sugar free" (will the marketers of such lies go to hell? I wonder about that). I have the AMWAY E-Spring, probably the best water filtration system. I will not drink tap water again, I am indeed a water snob. Trying to drink two liters a day.

I did lose a lot of weight by BANTING but it takes effort and I am lazy. I eat too much meat in that diet and I feel guilty.

So Squash and Water Aerobics are the way forward, especially Squash. My wife even bought me new undies. In case you wonder why I tell you such a morbid detail it is because on Tuesday, the aged squash shorts surrendered and burst asunder in the midst of a game. If I had not uncovered a "far too tight" pair of undies and put them on, my Cunning Foe would have been traumatised for life. I took the shorts home for repair but they were immediately chucked in the bin. Ruthless woman! Those shorts and I go back many years together. Sadly I am unable to wear my old squash shirts, fabric can only do so much...

I want to go back to the scale at the gym, but I think I should let a week elapse. Maybe insanity will be rewarded and I will see a spectacular change in the ghastly number, previously recorded. Hope is a marvellous thing.

![Squash buddies IMG_20181002_183938[26909].jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmXosXUd9MLsczMqxh5SZZmkyCU4EsBPkb1Nb7YojeXzD5/Squash%20buddies%20IMG_20181002_183938[26909].jpg)
(squash buddies)


Well another three evenings of squash have elapsed, it is incredible how quickly my body is getting back into shape.  last night I was a bit disappointed about how poorly I ended the evening off but in hindsight I suppose over an hour of running around on the court like a fool must wear me out eventually.  PATIENCE Human!!

The scale is grudgingly recording slightly lower numbers when I stand on it in hopeful anticipation...  My shoulders feel very tight but I am using the water aerobics to really stretch them out.  Lets see how long I can continue this sports combo.