Things you don't learn in school- How to deal with conflict by giantbear

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busy · @giantbear · Jun 10 '19 (edited)

$43.56

Things you don't learn in school- How to deal with conflict

<html>
<p>https://i1.wp.com/www.artsfwd.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/conflictcalvinh.jpg?ssl=1</p>
<p><a href="https://i1.wp.com/www.artsfwd.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/conflictcalvinh.jpg?ssl=1">Image source</a></p>
<p>Conflict is a normal part of any relationship. &nbsp;Whether it is work related or family related. No one can expect to agree with everyone all the time, but it is very important to know how to deal with conflict in a proper way and to resolve this in a civil way. &nbsp;</p>
<p>Many families break apart when conflict is involved and they just ignore each other for the rest of their lives. &nbsp;This causes great harm and distress because even though they want to resolve this matter, they don’t know how to or they are just too stubborn. Other people just avoid conflict and they never learn how to handle difficult situations in their lives.&nbsp;</p>
<p>Whatever causes these disagreements or disputes, it is important to learn some skills to handle these type of situations in your life, so that you can keep your professional and personal relationships strong.</p>
<h2><strong>What you should know about conflict:</strong></h2>
<p><br></p>
<ul>
  <li>Conflict is more than just a disagreement about something nitty gritty. &nbsp;It is a situation where both parties experience a threat.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Confliction causes stress especially if the issue is not resolved.</li>
  <li>Every person experience conflict differently. Each experience is influenced by our own life experiences, cultures, beliefs and values.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflict can bring forth some negative emotions and if you are unable to manage your emotions in times of stress then you might not be able to resolve conflict successfully.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflict is an ideal opportunity for growth. &nbsp;Not to say that you should cause conflict to grow, but if you are able to resolve conflict issues, then it builds trust and you can be sure that every relationship in your life can survive a challenge or a disagreement.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflicts often arise because our needs are different. A teenager wants to stay out late, and if the parents disagree, he/she gets angry at the parent where the parent on the other hand is only trying to protect his/her own child.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflict can arise when someone needs to feel understood and supported. &nbsp;If they don’t get that conflict will arise.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflict in the workplace can open pathways to team-building and improved work relationships.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Conflict can be traumatizing, but if you learn how to deal with conflict correctly, you might get rid of powerless feelings that you might have from previous experiences. Not all conflict situations are demoralizing or humiliating.&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<p>https://cdn5.vectorstock.com/i/thumb-large/64/49/business-woman-conflict-or-arguing-coworker-in-off-vector-7196449.jpg</p>
<p><a href="https://cdn5.vectorstock.com/i/thumb-large/64/49/business-woman-conflict-or-arguing-coworker-in-off-vector-7196449.jpg">Image source</a></p>
<h2><strong>How do we deal with conflict in a healthy way?</strong></h2>
<p><br></p>
<ul>
  <li>To see the other person’s point of view clearly although you might not agree with it.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Talk in a calm and non-defensive manner and be respectful towards the other person.&nbsp;</li>
  <li>Be ready to forgive and forget. &nbsp;Let the past be the past and do not hold regrets or stay angry. &nbsp;Keeping regrets will destroy your work relationship. &nbsp;</li>
  <li>Believe that conflict is the best way to resolve difficult issues until both parties come to a proper agreement.&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
<h2><strong>Conflict resolution and emotions</strong></h2>
<p><br></p>
<p>Conflict can trigger strong emotions and often lead to hurt feelings and sometimes even discomfort. &nbsp;If conflict is handled in a healthy way it increases your understanding for others, build trust and often strengthen relationships. &nbsp;</p>
<p>Couples as well as co-workers often argue about petty differences for example how they leave the bathroom towel, or how they drink their coffee, rather than to &nbsp;argue about what is really bothering them.&nbsp;</p>
<p>This is an unhealthy way to resolve issues. &nbsp;Rather be upfront and confront the person straight forward so that you can feel calm and relaxed in whichever situation you are in.&nbsp;</p>
<h2><strong>Different people react differently to certain situations. Some:</strong>&nbsp;</h2>
<p><br></p>
<p>• Has an angry or agitated response. &nbsp;</p>
<p>• Become withdrawn or depressed and keep quiet. Person spaces out and show very little emotion or energy. &nbsp;</p>
<p>• Has a frozen response. They freeze totally and look paralyzed, but under the surface they are extremely agitated.&nbsp;</p>
<h2>Stress interferes with the ability to resolve conflict by limiting your ability to:</h2>
<p><br></p>
<ul>
  <li>Be aware of you own emotions and feelings.</li>
  <li>Listen accurately to what someone else is saying.</li>
  <li>Communicate your needs clearly.</li>
</ul>
<p>You need to be emotionally aware, so that you can understand others as well as yourself. &nbsp;If you don’t even know how you feel, or are unable to communicate effectively it is difficult to resolve disagreements.</p>
<p>It may sound silly to understand your own feelings but plenty of people ignore their own feelings like anger, fear and sadness. &nbsp;Knowing your ability to handle conflict depends on being connected to these feelings. &nbsp;</p>
<p>If you are afraid of strong emotions and you only try to find rational solutions your ability to resolve conflict might suffer and you will not be able to find suitable solutions.&nbsp;</p>
<h2><strong>Why emotional awareness is a key factor in resolving conflict</strong></h2>
<p><br></p>
<p>Emotional awareness helps you to understand yourself, including what is troubling you and others. &nbsp;Emotional awareness helps you to stay motivated during a confrontation and it helps you to communicate clearly and effectively. &nbsp;</p>
<p>In the end nobody likes any conflict but if you are mature about it, conflict could really change the way you do things in your life and can be totally beneficial in a way that you can not even imagine.&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>https://steemitimages.com/DQmd73NC2v4u5AFvdqmUiSzSE9NF3JyDTaPN74W5czMZvSQ/giantbear.png&nbsp;</p>
<p>https://i.postimg.cc/kg9QSSyS/powerhouse.gif</p>
<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;https://imgp.whaleshares.io/0x0/https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://cdn.steemitimages.com/0x0/https://imgoat.com/uploads/f93f983524/109474.gif</p>
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@allyinspirit · Jun 11 '19

When there are differences of opinion or attitude, I like to reflect on how boring our world would be if we all thought and felt the same. 

I agree with you about emotional awareness being critical when conflicts arise. Emotional: Plus full being awareness to be sensitive to another being who may actually be in 'pain.' ♥︎♥︎⚖️♥︎♥︎

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@blockurator · Jun 12 '19

Great post, @giantbear. Absolutely correct, conflict can help us grow in so many ways. It's important to try to see things from others' point of view.

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@blueeyes8960 · Jun 11 '19

Really good post with a lot of sound advice and information.  We all have conflict, it's up to us how we handle it.

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@chesatochi · Jun 11 '19

It is always a state of mind and put the energy to confront the hard situation!

👍 giantbear

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@chrisaiki · Jun 11 '19

Hello @giantbear, Ashoka has developped exercices to start empathy at school
https://startempathy.org/

👍 giantbear

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@giantbear · Jun 11 '19

Thank you @chrisaiki I will definitely go and have a look there!

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@d00k13 · Jun 12 '19

I believe it also requires both sides of the conflict to have an understanding of resolution as some people just seem to search for things to start conflict over while not even being aware of doing so.

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@deeanndmathews · Jun 12 '19

I love the way you laid out this issue ... I have played the role of diplomat in my circles for years, and it was wonderful to me to come to this article and review an exposition of what conflict is and why it happens, how it can be handled positively, and steps to take to reach the possibility of growth and trust in relationships through conflict.

👍 giantbear

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@dswigle · Jun 11 '19

Conflict isn't always bad, but, the way you handle it is the important thing. How boring would we be if we didn't mix it up a bit!  

!tip

👍 giantbear

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@helpiecake · Jun 11 '19

Hello! 

This post has been manually curated, resteemed
and gifted with some virtually delicious cake
from the @helpiecake curation team!  
 

Much love to you from all of us at @helpie!
Keep up the great work! 

<a href="http://steemit.com/@helpie">
![helpiecake](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRgZy78juiL4gELcKg3ywX6bgefQguDcTUZGC5HCbYYLW/15-cute-easter-cupcake-ideas-decorating-recipes-for-easter-easter-cupcake-ideas.jpg)
</a>


Manually curated by @vibesforlife.

👍 giantbear

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@joanstewart · Jun 12 '19

Conflict arises more often than not in not understanding one another properly, stop, listen, think before opening your mouth _words normally drive one into actions you may regret_.

We all have barriers we normally do not want to cross, making us agitated which sometimes leads to inner turmoil.

Great topic to discuss for young and old!

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@kaerpediem · Jun 13 '19

We are such emotional beings... 
Sometimes we are in such a state that all logic goes out the window

Thank you for breaking it down for us :)

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@nurseanne84 · Jun 11 '19

Yeah, conflict can truly be difficult to resolve especially when a person refuses to communicate or communicates in an emotional way.

I am not really aware of the other things that needed to resolve a conflict but thank you for sharing.

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@ocdb · Jun 12 '19

re-giantbear-things-you-don-t-learn-in-school-how-to-deal-with-conflict-20190612t091700024z

You got a 33.39% upvote from @ocdb courtesy of @giantbear!  :)

@ocdb is a non-profit bidbot for whitelisted Steemians, current max bid is 40 SBD and the equivalent amount in STEEM.
Check our website https://thegoodwhales.io/ for the whitelist, queue and delegation info. Join our [Discord channel for more information.](https://discord.gg/k2Hu77b)


If you like what @ocd does, consider voting for [ocd-witness through SteemConnect](steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=ocd-witness&approve=1) or on the [Steemit Witnesses page.](https://steemit.com/~witnesses) :)

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@papilloncharity · Jun 11 '19

A great post here and so glad that I am known as a peacemaker.
Blessings!

👍 giantbear

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@porters · Jun 12 '19

Thanks so much for this - it is just what I needed as I work through my week points of emotional awareness and being able to express my emotions in a healthy way. Seeing conflict in a whole new light!

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@rem-steem · Jun 11 '19

That's some really good advice. Though it's not always possible to manage or remember all the thing. But we have to practice and make ourselves listen to us and control our vibes to reduce conflict. 
Thanks for sharing!

👍 giantbear

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@steem-ua · Jun 11 '19

#### Hi @giantbear!

Your post was upvoted by @steem-ua, new Steem dApp, using UserAuthority for algorithmic post curation!
Your **UA** account score is currently 5.209 which ranks you at **#911** across all Steem accounts.
Your rank has dropped 3 places in the last three days (old rank 908).

In our last Algorithmic Curation Round, consisting of 190 contributions, your post is ranked at **#154**.
##### Evaluation of your UA score:

* You've built up a nice network.
* The readers appreciate your great work!
* Try to work on user engagement: the more people that interact with you via the comments, the higher your UA score!


**Feel free to join our [@steem-ua Discord server](https://discord.gg/KpBNYGz)**

👍 giantbear

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@steemitbloggers · Jun 11 '19

<center>Congratulations @giantbear! This post was selected by the [Power House Creatives]( https://steemit.com/@steemitbloggers) as today's Rally Upvote Post :) 

You can find the community announcement on Discord :) and it has also been shared on our [FB Page]( https://www.facebook.com/steemitbloggersint/) and [Twitter feed]( https://twitter.com/@steemitbloggers).

<center>![PHC-Footer-05.gif](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmZMTckzqpfBShZSELLFNotjm43vJfjg79Ynz4ndB3i86a/PHC-Footer-05.gif)</center>

</center>

👍 giantbear

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@steemitboard · Jun 11 '19

Congratulations @giantbear! You have completed the following achievement on the Steem blockchain and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

<table><tr><td><img src="https://steemitimages.com/60x70/https://steemitboard.com/@giantbear/votes.png?201906111219"></td><td>You distributed more than 91000 upvotes. Your next target is to reach 92000 upvotes.</td></tr>
</table>

<sub>_You can view [your badges on your Steem Board](https://steemitboard.com/@giantbear) and compare to others on the [Steem Ranking](https://steemitboard.com/ranking/index.php?name=giantbear)_</sub>
<sub>_If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word_ `STOP`</sub>


To support your work, I also upvoted your post!


> You can upvote this notification to help all Steem users. Learn how [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)!

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@tipu · Jun 11 '19

&#127873; Hi @giantbear! You have received 0.1 SBD tip from @dswigle!<br><p><strong>@dswigle wrote lately about: <a href=https://www.steemit.com/@dswigle/beautiful-sunday-sublimely-so-in-monochrome rel="noopener"> Beautiful Sunday, Sublimely So In Monochrome</a></strong> Feel free to follow @dswigle if you like it :)</p><p><a href="https://steemit.com/steemit/@tipu/tipu-tips-guide" rel="noopener">Sending tips with @tipU - how to guide :)</a></p>

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@traciyork · Jun 11 '19

<blockquote>
In the end nobody likes any conflict but if you are mature about it, conflict could really change the way you do things in your life and can be totally beneficial in a way that you can not even imagine. 

</blockquote>

Excellent point, @giantbear and...
<center>https://media.giphy.com/media/8lWyr47Rk0IokkwrBc/giphy.gif
<a href="https://giphy.com/gifs/8lWyr47Rk0IokkwrBc">via GIPHY</a></center>

👍 giantbear

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@wales · Jun 11 '19

I'm tired of it

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@wonderwop · Jun 11 '19

I wonder if this might help with a 40 year friendship gone wrong.

Posted using [Partiko Android](https://partiko.app/referral/wonderwop)

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