If you have read any of my other "Geeky Dad's Movie Guides", you may have noticed a common theme. I'm generally pretty positive about kids movies. I set the bar far lower for them than I would for a movie of my choosing. If my kids have fun and I'm not bored, I feel I have gotten my money's worth. With that low of a bar, it should be no surprise that I have only written one negative review to this point (*Middle School the Worst Years of My Life*). 

# Well I am about to write negative review number two.

<br><center>http://img.goldposter.com/2016/12/sing_poster_goldposter_com_10.jpg
*There is a reason this movie is not titled "Story"*.</center><br>

Yesterday, I took my 11 year old son and 9 year old daughter to see *Sing*. Both of them were very eager to see it. My wife had to go into work for a while so she skipped the movie. Lucky her. 

*Sing* is about a Koala named Buster Moon who runs a live performance theater. Buster is voiced by Mathew McConaughey (yes seriously). I am honestly not sure why the producers chose McConaughey for the role. I actually like him as an actor but he is 47 years old and does not have a voice that lends itself to a cute kids movie. I was a bit confused at how old this main character was supposed to be. He acted like he was fairly young... but I couldn't stop picturing old man McConaughey every time the fury little guy spoke. 

<br><center>https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/97/5c/a3/975ca347e3dd287ac13f7403b7c3ce17.jpg
*Every time he spoke I was expecting 
him to say "alright alright alright".*</center><br>

Buster's theater has fallen on some hard times and is about to go out of business. Buster has the brilliant idea to rejuvenate the theater by putting on a singing competition for regular people. Perhaps this may have been a timely plot 14 years ago when American Idol first began; however, it seemed odd to be making a movie about this subject in the year that Idol finally died.

After Buster decided to hold the contest, the audience is introduced to the main characters including two pigs, a gorilla, a porcupine, a mouse, and an elephant.  The pigs are pretty funny and the shy elephant with stage fright is set up perfectly for a transforming moment of bravery... but aside from that, the other characters were not very likable. 

<br><center>https://i2.wp.com/heatst.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/sing-gorillas-racist.jpg?crop=0px%2C460px%2C3000px%2C1137px&resize=871%2C330&quality=80&strip=info
*Oh those wacky parents who try to force their kids to be criminals, will they never learn?*</center><br>

The gorilla is in a gang and actually takes part in a robbery while running back and forth from singing rehearsal. That's right, this is a kids movie and one of the climactic moments involves one of the "heroes" committing a crime. Buster lies to and runs from the bank's loan officer throughout the movie. The mouse is flat out mean to everyone... and the writers never even bother to allow he to redeem himself. He just stays mean. The porcupine is in a toxic relationship with her boyfriend who tries to keep her from being successful out of jealousy. Even the mother pig (who may be my favorite character) is in a 1940s marriage where her husband won't help her with the kids. She actually leaves all 25 of them (yes 25) at home alone so she can attend rehearsal. Buster's best friend is an unemployed sheep who sponges off his rich parents and lives in their pool house. Again, how old are these characters supposed to be? 

The more I think about it, the more I can't figure out what the writers were thinking. 

### This plot seems more like one from a prime time soap opera rather than the plot of a kids movie.

<br><center>https://modernworksmusicpublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/large/public/nashville_4.jpg?itok=MwSQTTk8
*Criminals, cheating boyfriends, and bank foreclosures 
seem more suited for this show than a kids movie.*</center><br>

But the movie does have a nice gimmick to use as a crutch. The movie is filled with singing cartoon animals. Basically any kid under ten is going to like that... my daughter was no exception. The songs are actually all pretty good. Some of the performance scenes are funny while others are emotional and touching. The writers actually did a decent job of this. 

Out of the 100 minute run time, approximately 35 minutes involved animals singing or dancing. They spread these scenes out enough to keep me awake... barely. 

Because the gimmick is so effective, I can see why people might walk away thinking "That was cute. I liked it." Perhaps that is enough for a kids movie. If people enjoy that, more power to them. I am happy they had a good time with their kids. But for me, I at least want a little effort to tell an interesting story.

If you are able to get your kids to wait for the DVD, do it. That way you can walk out of the room for the "story" and return for the singing animals.

# Geeky Dad's Movie Guide
Number of times I fell asleep: **0** (The singing and dancing animals were spread out as if the writers knew parents might nod off otherwise)
Number of eye rolls: **4 (Some bad jokes plus some scenes that made no sense in a kids movie)**
Number of face palms: **2 (for the most egregious non-kids movie scenes**
Number of times my kids asked to go to the bathroom or get food out of sheer boredom: **2 (My son only)** 
Number of times I checked steemit: **2 (Not literally... but I was bored enough to do it a couple of times.)**
Number of times I said "That's ridiculous": **3 (the writing is pretty flimsy even for a kids movie)**
Did my kids like it: **My 9 year old  daughter: A weak yes. My 11 year old son: Not at all.**
Would I see it without my kids: **Absolutely not.** 
Full price/Matinee/Rental/Free/Not worth the time:  **Rental for my daughter. Not worth the time for my son and I.**

### Have you seen *Sing*? Do you agree or disagree with my opinion?

*Image Credits* [1](http://img.goldposter.com/2016/12/sing_poster_goldposter_com_10.jpg), [2](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/97/5c/a3/975ca347e3dd287ac13f7403b7c3ce17.jpg), [3](https://i2.wp.com/heatst.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/sing-gorillas-racist.jpg?crop=0px%2C460px%2C3000px%2C1137px&resize=871%2C330&quality=80&strip=info), [4](https://modernworksmusicpublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/large/public/nashville_4.jpg?itok=MwSQTTk8)