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Dependencia / Dependency by helengutier2

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· @helengutier2 ·
$13.65
Dependencia / Dependency
<div class"text-justify">Desde niños somos dependientes, en el vientre materno del cordón umbilical y el cuerpo de nuestras madres, al nacer somos dependientes de nuestros padres que son quienes nos enseñan a hablar caminar, dependemos de ellos, hasta mucha edad, hay sociedades donde a los hijos ya mayores de edad, incluso son criados de manera independiente, desprendidos mientras hay otras sociedades que crean a los hijos dependientes que no tengan que dejar el nido.

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>From childhood we are dependent, in the womb of the umbilical cord and the body of our mothers, at birth we are dependent on our parents who are the ones who teach us to talk walk, we depend on them, until very old, there are societies where the children already of age, even are raised independently, detached while there are other societies that create dependent children who do not have to leave the nest.

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<center>![GridArt_20231009_204638516.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmdXUHLPgEUGtbRhtKDzfkTBXhiFU8ybazj96BtmEMAjRz/GridArt_20231009_204638516.jpg)</center>

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En este punto no es que seamos padres desprendidos, nos cuesta mucho por que fuimos criados dependientes eso ha marcado mucho lo que somos como parejas, muchas de nosotras a causa de la ausencia paterna, buscamos aprobación y cariño paterno en nuestras parejas, creamos dependencia emocional, no separar estos sentimientos nos hace vulnerables.

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Entonces el hombre toma su posición de poder sobre la otra persona que desea ser tratada con una hija, eso da pie a que la relación se vuelve tóxica, a tal punto de la agresión física, hay mujeres que se sienten ese apego tan grande que no se miden y son capaces de soportar maltratos físicos y psicológicos, están tan apegadas que hasta justifican el maltrato, he visto en mi consulta pacientes con golpes que le han fracturado los dientes.

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Pero no salen de allí por que no trabajan no saben que hacer, nada son dependientes, no tienen dinero solo se han dedicado a las labores del hogar, entonces atraen a parejas dominantes, ellas dejas que esa persona les resuelva dejan todas las decisiones en sus manos, al principio puedes sentir una gran tranquilidad por que no tienes responsabilidad, no tienes cargas pero luego las circunstancias te llevan a la realidad.

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>At this point it is not that we are detached fathers, it is very difficult for us because we were raised dependent and that has marked a lot what we are as couples, many of us because of paternal absence, we seek approval and parental affection in our partners, we create emotional dependence, not separating these feelings makes us vulnerable.

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>Then the man takes his position of power over the other person who wants to be treated with a daughter, that gives rise to the relationship becomes toxic, to the point of physical aggression, there are women who feel that attachment so great that they do not measure themselves and are able to withstand physical and psychological abuse, they are so attached that they even justify the abuse, I have seen in my practice patients with blows that have fractured teeth.

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>But they don't get out of there because they don't work, they don't know what to do, they are dependent, they have no money, they have only dedicated themselves to housework, then they attract dominant partners, they let that person solve their problems, they leave all the decisions in their hands, at the beginning you can feel a great tranquility because you have no responsibility, you have no burden but then the circumstances take you to reality.

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<center>![GridArt_20231009_204714335.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmPNH4puQ9vz783yxK5mgw6pRsd8KvFrHjKsmLhzSSqLTb/GridArt_20231009_204714335.jpg)</center>

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Una infidelidad, divorcio o la muerte de tu pareja, te deja completamente desarmada, allí es que comienzas a darte cuenta de que eras dependiente no sabes hacer absolutamente nada, no estás acostumbrada a tomar decisiones, sientes que el mundo se cae sobre tus hombros, allí llega el momento donde debes saber de qué estás hecha, no es ser feminista es que nuestro papel en la sociedad ha cambiado, aunque todavía existe mucho machismo mal llevado, donde las víctimas son las mujeres, por esa dependencia, donde preferimos creer que las cosas van a cambiar pero la que tienes que cambiar eres tú.

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Hay que dejar de ser dependiente, emocional y económicamente, estar pendiente de las banderas rojas que tú misma debes tener desde niñas, no podemos normalizar el maltrato, por que si desde niños eres víctimas de maltratos el niño aprende a normalizar esa situación, por lo que para esas personas ya adultas es normal el maltrato, por eso hay tantas mujeres que ven normal esta situación.

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Otras te dicen que es peor vivir sola, que prefieren aguantar que ir a vivir a la calle por que no saben hacer nada, de este grupo hay muchas en cualquier clase social, donde el hombre es el proveedor y la mujer no opina ni dice nada, aunque algunas ven eso como su vida ideal, pero es dependencia, creo que si se necesita compartir las responsabilidades, no dejarlas en manos de otros así sea quien provee.

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>An infidelity, divorce or death of your partner, leaves you completely unarmed, there is when you begin to realize that you were dependent you do not know how to do absolutely nothing, you are not used to make decisions, you feel that the world falls on your shoulders, there comes the moment where you must know what you are made of, it is not being feminist is that our role in society has changed, although there is still much machismo badly led, where the victims are women, by that dependence, where we prefer to believe that things will change but the one who has to change is you.

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>You have to stop being dependent, emotionally and economically, be aware of the red flags that you yourself must have since you are a child, we cannot normalize abuse, because if you are victims of abuse since you are a child, the child learns to normalize that situation, so for those people who are already adults, abuse is normal, that's why there are so many women who see this situation as normal.

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>Others tell you that it is worse to live alone, that they prefer to put up with it than go live in the street because they do not know how to do anything, there are many of this group in any social class, where the man is the provider and the woman has no opinion or say anything, although some see that as their ideal life, but it is dependence, I think that if you need to share the responsibilities, not leave them in the hands of others even if it is the one who provides.

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<center>![GridArt_20231009_204745317.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmNfiMxdNew4rjSodkfCK89EBCMFoyjvCYf1GgNRRExNbC/GridArt_20231009_204745317.jpg)</center>

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Las relaciones interpersonales son complicadas pero lo que si debemos tener claro que para tener relaciones sanas debemos aprender a comunicarnos, eso nos ayuda a colocar en la balanza lo que estamos dispuestos a cambiar y aquello donde no, dependiendo de esto debemos tomar una decisión importante, creo que por esa razón hay tantas personas  que prefieren no vivir en pareja, no están dispuestos a ceder en ningún aspecto simplemente viven su vida en soledad.

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Vivir de esta decisión en soledad, es individual, no querer cambiar nada de tu estilo de vida es aceptable no significa que seas infeliz, por que la felicidad no se mide por estar o no estar en pareja, se mide por la capacidad que tienes de ser feliz tu misma haciendo lo que te gusta, lo más importante es que te sientas bien contigo mismo, pero sin ser dependiente solo de ti mismo.

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>Interpersonal relationships are complicated but what we must be clear about is that in order to have healthy relationships we must learn to communicate, that helps us to place in the balance what we are willing to change and what we are not, depending on this we must make an important decision, I think that for that reason there are so many people who prefer not to live in a couple, they are not willing to compromise in any aspect, they simply live their lives in solitude.

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>Living this decision alone, is individual, not wanting to change anything in your lifestyle is acceptable does not mean that you are unhappy, because happiness is not measured by being or not being in a couple, it is measured by the ability you have to be happy yourself doing what you like, the most important thing is that you feel good about yourself, but without being dependent only on yourself.

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<center>![GridArt_20231114_230453691.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmQ97d6h6U1GtD1XhNhyNF4EM9SXBFdzt5dq88tYKyf16G/GridArt_20231114_230453691.jpg)</center>

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Así que por más que en el pasado, las dependencias eran vista como normal, incluso como una excelente familia, pero eso no es del todo cierto, la búsqueda de la felicidad empieza por dejar atrás las dependencias emocionales, comprender que las luchas son individuales, que el amor y la felicidad están dentro de ti, debes depender solo de ti, no crearte expectativas y vivir solo un día a la vez.</div>

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>So as much as in the past, dependencies were seen as normal, even as an excellent family, but that is not entirely true, the pursuit of happiness begins by leaving behind emotional dependencies, understanding that the struggles are individual, that love and happiness are within you, you must depend only on you, not create expectations and live only one day at a time.

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<center><h2>Helengutier2

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VOY POR MAS</h2>

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@emiliorios ·
Siento que la libertad de ser, elegir, decidir, no se negocia.
Lo divulgo constantemente.
Un excelente tema @helengutier2 
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@helengutier2 ·
Pues, no me costó mucho entenderlo y más ponerlo en práctica hay que cumplir con todo pero en libertad esa es la clave
👍  
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@petrica33 ·
Excelente publicación, todo esta dentro de nosotros, si queremos ser libre y felices, primero debemos de limpiarnos y liberarnos, no llegamos a este mundo amarrados, sino libre y la vida es hoy y hay que vivirla.
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@helengutier2 ·
Así es pero eso acarrea responsabilidad con uno mismo y con los que te rodean hay que tener cuidado con lo que se pide
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@timi01 ·
>An infidelity, divorce or death of your partner, leaves you completely unarmed, there is when you begin to realize that you were dependent you do not know how to do absolutely nothing, you are not used to make decisions, you feel that the world falls on your shoulders, there comes the moment where you must know what you are made of, it is not being feminist is that our role in society has changed, although there is still much machismo badly led, where the victims are women, by that dependence, where we prefer to believe that things will change but the one who has to change is you.

This part actually got me full of word of experience alot of divorced or death partner get to have more knowledge about life and they understand what it takes 
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