Transformation #2 by meesterboom

View this thread on: hive.blog | peakd.com | ecency.com

life · @meesterboom · Aug 13 '19

$18.44

Transformation #2

![IMG-PHOTO-ART--1975494978.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmacq3H1G1az8RyFjSxT8eEqBHcErP6VbQpXV61XSCcYWr/IMG-PHOTO-ART--1975494978.jpg)

I squinted at the computer screen in front of me and let out an airy grunt like a flatulent Donkey with a cork jammed up its arse.

My boss had sent me a document to review with the subject line screaming -

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813175644332.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmUBVk2kwoFLVv97jbM3gNfsMLPGZeFL1i3Eow8T1tZHcC/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813175644332.jpg)

I tore my gaze from the screen and looked out the window. It was raining. It always seemed to be raining these days.

I needed a case. A private detective like myself was nothing without *detectivity* in his life.

Even the thought of masturbating into a jar of pickled garlic cloves wasn't helping shift my malaise.

Sighing, I turned back to the screen.

Next to me a chair creaked and I swiveled my chair around to grumpily chastise the owner, *Mikey.*

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181103237.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmdKC7kNaphCwr1dm9tPq6SbREF1G9B8tDwshCHLtgQFcY/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181103237.jpg)

*Hey, can you stop making so much bastarding noise? I'm trying to work here!?*

*Work?? You've been staring at your screen for the better part of three hours. I wish I had that kind of 'work.'*

Mikey snarked in response.

My hand snaked out and grabbed *Mikey's* pen from his desk, making him flinch.

*You like pens, Mikey? You think they will let you have pens in prison?*

I growled at him like I was a man who had seen too many pens in his life.

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181357641.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVJCof1Vh69ipF6DobcRXLmpwuFPV1eFVPCHfuAgawYzQ/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181357641.jpg)

*Hey! Gimme that back!?*

*Mikey* hooked a hand out to snatch at his pen but I darted back and leapt to my feet brandishing it as if I were in a room full of factory workers and the pen was indeed my jam-smeared penis.

*Not so fast, sunshine.*

*BoomDawg, give me my bloody pen back. Haven't you got work to do?*

He whined piteously like a fox on a treadmill wondering where the end was.

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181755432.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmU6ffNKFHLto5WgzQhS3sK3C6siV9i3ysvaGuoF2w3cH6/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813181755432.jpg)

I flicked it contemptuously at him and he grabbed it clumsily from the air.

*That's just a taster, Mikey. Now, tell me. What's the word on the street? Who is sticking what to who? When is the man not the man?*

*Mikey* clutched at his pen and glared at me.

*There's nothing new happening. Oh, wait. One of the guys was saying something about a new Transformation project kicking off?*

*Mikey's* voice trailed off and he looked at me with concern.

*Hey, are you ok?*

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813182032349.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmcCwtp7nQBUsqeT6hw1tPdWVDwWr24asQwy1XjnV5rm4X/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813182032349.jpg)

I blinked rapidly. *Transformation...* There was a word that stirred up painful memories. Memories best left untouched.

*Transformation you say?*

My voice was quiet, dangerous sounding.

*Yeah you know, like upgrading our systems and IT processes and shit?*

I leapt forward and grabbed *Mikey* by the front of his off-white, grubby shirt.

*An upgrade to our archaic IT systems, Mikey? Or a dreadful experiment conducted by shadowy figures within our organisation who may or may not be terrestrial in origin!?*

![hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813182226082.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmNb3jHWM8RiFB2yWzZ2MSAchnTn3RiBChPpLFLPR4thPU/hfydtasfj_20190806181948082_20190807181009906_20190808181104523_20190809171819418_20190812185704871_20190813182226082.jpg)

*Mikey* struggled and sputtered in my iron grip. At the back of my mind I hoped he wasn't becoming aroused. Hell, I hoped I wasn't.

*What!?! Shadowy whats!? No!? I don't know what the hell you are talking about!?*

Dismissively, I let him go. He slumped into his chair like an old bag of washing.

So, *Mikey* was denying the involvement of aliens in the matters of men? Denying some kind of fiendish plot to subvert humanity into something *else...*

This could only mean one thing.

I pulled on my coat and reached out for my Fedora settling it onto my head at a jaunty angle.

It looked like I had a case...

https://youtu.be/vkal2bNKZe4

👍 ocdb, busy.pay, vcelier, wherein, slowwalker, exyle, onceuponatime, steembasicincome, meesterboom, slobberchops, stephenkendal, tatjanastan, sbi2, nonameslefttouse, hanshotfirst, kus-knee, nanzo-scoop, trafalgar, ace108, smasssh, likwid, partiko, daan, t-bot, abh12345, joythewanderer, getonthetrain, goodvibrations, huch, tarazkp, justineh, afiqsejuk, revisesociology, jedau, davedickeyyall, broncofan99, uwelang, velimir, barge, brianphobos, whack.science, adventureevryday, afrinsultana, writesteem, soyrosa, playfulfoodie, isaria, karenb54, justyy, silviabeneforti, ddschteinn, stevelivingston, mcfarhat, darth-azrael, mammasitta, dreemit, cryptoandcoffee, chops.support, professorbromide, upvoteshares, acolucky, drorion, netaterra, aksinya, and 183 others

properties (23)

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`created`	2019-08-13 17:26:06
`last_update`	2019-08-13 17:26:06
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@abh12345 · Aug 13 '19

$0.03

But what about the urgent review?!

👍 meesterboom

`author`	abh12345
`permlink`	pw6vr6
`category`	life
`json_metadata`	{"tags":["life"],"app":"steemit/0.1"}
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properties (23)vote details (1)

voter	weight	wgt%	rshares	pct	time
meesterboom	0 B		114,720,795,149	9%

@meesterboom · Aug 13 '19 (edited)

Nothing is as urgent as the safety of the human race!! ;0D

👍 abh12345

properties (23)vote details (1)

voter	weight	wgt%	rshares	pct	time
abh12345	0 B		52,364,867,161	12%

@abh12345 · Aug 13 '19

$0.04

Excuses, excuses.  Not a bad one though but you will be feeling the wrath in the morning!

👍 meesterboom

`author`	abh12345
`permlink`	pw6wh1
`category`	life
`json_metadata`	{"tags":["life"],"app":"steemit/0.1"}
`created`	2019-08-13 19:22:12
`last_update`	2019-08-13 19:22:12
`depth`	3
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1 reply

@angryman · Aug 13 '19

$0.04

>Even the thought of masturbating into a jar of pickled garlic cloves wasn't helping shift my malaise.

Man...If *that* thought didn't rouse you from the doldrums...perhaps *nothing* would...!?!?!? My sympathies...

👍 meesterboom, guiltyparties

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meesterboom	0 B		113,470,703,207	9%
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@meesterboom · Aug 13 '19

I know, you know it's serious when that doesn't help. Even worse, I am clean out of garlic mayo!!

properties (22)

@angryman · Aug 13 '19

$0.04

A most maddening pre-dick-ament to be in; I'm sure...????

👍 meesterboom

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properties (23)vote details (1)

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1 reply

@anneke · Aug 14 '19

$0.04

Where there is an upgrade there is a conspiracy............ I hate upgrades.  Glad Mickey is back - he has been gone a while but still a whimp it seems LOL

👍 meesterboom

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@meesterboom · Aug 14 '19

Always am establishment wimp that man. Hell end up in prison!! ;0D

👍 anneke

properties (23)vote details (1)

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@choogirl · Aug 13 '19

$0.04

Did you give him his pen back?

👍 meesterboom

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properties (23)vote details (1)

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@meesterboom · Aug 13 '19

HAhahaha! Of course. I'm not a monster! :O)

👍 choogirl

properties (23)vote details (1)

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choogirl	0 B		2,348,121,275	5%

@choogirl · Aug 14 '19

&#x1F914; &#x1F602;

properties (22)

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@dreemit · Aug 13 '19

$0.04

What I wan to know is- why did Fedora's go out of fashion, they're so dashing! On you at least 😉

Posted using [Partiko Android](https://partiko.app/referral/dreemit)

👍 meesterboom

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properties (23)vote details (1)

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@meesterboom · Aug 13 '19

I think it is one of the greatest crimes ever to befall humanity. Bring em back and spats whatever the hell they are!

properties (22)

@ocdb · Aug 18 '19

re-meesterboom-transformation-2-20190818t172416818z

You got a 17.76% upvote from @ocdb courtesy of @meesterboom!  :)

@ocdb is a non-profit bidbot for whitelisted Steemians, current max bid is 15 SBD and the equivalent amount in STEEM.
Check our website https://thegoodwhales.io/ for the whitelist, queue and delegation info. Join our [Discord channel for more information.](https://discord.gg/k2Hu77b)


If you like what @ocd does, consider voting for [ocd-witness through SteemConnect](steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=ocd-witness&approve=1) or on the [Steemit Witnesses page.](https://steemit.com/~witnesses) :)

properties (22)

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@partiko · Aug 15 '19

Thank you so much for participating in the Partiko Delegation Plan Round 1! We really appreciate your support! As part of the delegation benefits, we just gave you a 3.00% upvote! Together, let’s change the world!

properties (22)

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@ryivhnn · Aug 14 '19

$0.04

Finding trouble where there's none again? XD

<center>https://technonaturalist.net/sites/default/files/styles/sensible_display/public/art/2017/11/goatsig-t.png?itok=Ml3FDq7c</center>

👍 meesterboom

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properties (23)vote details (1)

voter	weight	wgt%	rshares	pct	time
meesterboom	0 B		115,500,757,975	9%

@meesterboom · Aug 14 '19

Without trouble there is no life!!

properties (22)