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Two weeks ago, I wrote a [post with tips and suggestions](https://steemit.com/@modernzorker/starting-out-on-steemit-nine-humble-suggestions-and-tips-for-minnows) to help new Steemit users get the most out of their experience here on the platform. One of those suggestions I made was to avoid using the resteeming/upvoting services that spam advertise themselves by sending .001 SBD to your wallet with a copy/pasted message about how much they can do for promoting your post (in return for a small fee, naturally).

Yesterday though, I got to thinking: I haven't tested that out recently. Maybe I'm overlooking a valuable tool in a Steemit user's arsenal. Is it possible my stance on resteemers and upvote bots is out of touch with reality? What if things have changed in six months? The last thing I want to do is give out false information to readers, or discourage them from using these services if they really and truly work.

So after writing my comic blog entry about [that time a *Warrior Nun Areala* comic came with a VHS tape](https://steemit.com/comics/@modernzorker/michael-s-long-box-warrior-nun-areala-the-anime-1997-antarctic-press-video) (which you really should read if you haven't already, because it's just the sort of weird story you come to Steemit to learn!), I decided it was time to put those resteem services to the test.

*All* of them.

That's right: every last one of those resteem-service-spamming accounts that send me wallet ads in the last couple of weeks got a piece of my hard-earned STEEM. I, Modern Zorker, took several for the team. I'm not going to name the ones I used (if you're *really* that interested, you can hit my Wallet up and scroll through the list to find them), but I will remark on the results.

As of this writing, that article is worth $2.48 and earned 489 upvotes.

To achieve this, I paid out a total of 4.300 STEEM. Despite one of those upvoting services providing me with the biggest single upvote on the article, if you discount the upvote I gave myself (worth roughly 12 cents), my upvote from @steembasicincome (worth 40 cents), and the upvotes from my regular cadre and crew who can be counted on to show up pretty much every time I post (worth right around $1.00, give or take, of that post's current value), you can see the absolute joke of a return these services provide in exchange for your cash.

I paid 4.300 STEEM for the equivalent of a $0.96 upvote. That's a return on investment so shitty JPMorgan Chase would have apologized for it and refunded my money.

I'm not writing this because I'm seeking upvotes or pity--I've got enough STEEM floating around that I can afford to waste a few on what is basically confirming a hypothesis. I'm writing this to show that, no, these resteem spammers that show up in your transaction feed every time you make a post do *not* deliver anywhere near what their flowery prose copy/paste memo might lead you to believe.

What's hilarious though is that these bots clearly keep track of one another. As soon as I started sending STEEM to them, an avalanche of transaction memos from a slew of other resteem/upvote services crawled out of the woodwork like a bunch of cockroaches. Sometimes the service *I had just used* spammed my wallet 2-3 more times, on the off-chance I had other posts I wanted desperately to lose money on. I felt like I'd stuck my face into a bukkake video where masochists jizzed 1/10th of a cent on me from every angle. If only there was some way to tease these fools into sending me SBD without me having to send them bigger amounts.

Hmmm...that's got me wondering about another potential experiment. How smart *are* these wanksticks, and can I pull a Machiavelli on their collective idiocy? Stay tuned for the results, dear readers... :D
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Anyway, in light of the evidence collected, I feel this settles the matter for the time being.

If we have a major explosion where the internal price of STEEM jacks itself above $4 again, I may test these services a second time. 400+ upvotes at zero or near-zero values isn't worth it. 400+ upvotes, each worth at least a penny on the other hand, is an entirely different story.

I stand by my assertion from that earlier article: rather than waste your money on these or other upvote bots and services, simply buy another share or two of @steembasicincome. The short-term-only returns on the resteemers are pitiful. The long-term returns from investing in yourself and other members of the community last as long as you keep posting.

Thank you so much for reading this far. Hit the 'upvote' button if you'd like to help me recoup some of the funds I sent to these fart-gargling dick turkeys, and follow me if you don't want to miss the next phase of 'Operation: Resteem Bot', cuz this battle ain't over yet.