Do you believe all in the universe is preordained, and deterministic, or that its all just chaos piled upon chaos?

I found the birth of my first child, Henry; put a lot of stuff in perspective. 
I couldn't cuddle him and believe I'd made any mistakes prior to his conception.
Every decision, every whim, every accident that lead to his existence were all vindicated by it. 

![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmbWF7aJZRmvMpNzkLpjrA3e2bypeNusmcEB1WVmENfKBT/image.png)

I have these thoughts all the time as well. I used to work in a job that paid me an insane amount of money but was rapidly sending me into a spiral towards a breakdown. I left and now make a pittance by comparison. There is rarely a day that I don’t miss having the ability to buy whatever I wanted when ever I wanted it. So I have to constantly remind myself that I am far healthier now than I was then. And if I hadn’t left, I’d probably be a complete wreck and useless to anyone.

Haha! You could go through life wondering these things, couldn't you?! It's sometimes easier to chalk it down to experience. So many people have said that losing a bad job ended up being for the best in the end. 

Debt collection sounds awful!

Sounds like the new job and change of scenery is a breath of fresh air :) #onwardandupward

Life can have some very interesting ups and downs. I made some major league mistakes in my past, and some of them have flow on costs. Others, however, have had minimal effects. 

Sometimes the greatest thing you can do for your life, is to put your own needs first. I lost a job for doing my job. I am currently unemployed and there are a million things that I could have done to make employing me easier, but on the other side of things I learned the true nature of people who work in job centres (and it's appalling).

Clearly, you wouldn't have had this job if you were still employed elsewhere. I read a book once that basically said the most successful people in life are the ones who have a zero threshold for bullshit.

I've seen it happen where a woman came into where I was working and with 2 hours she had decided to quit (because she was being spoken down to and disrespected). To some, it would appear immature, but to me I saw it as someone who knows what she wanted and decided very quickly that she'd rather be unemployed than work in a hostile environment.

I'm proud of how you've managed with the stresses you've been through and thank you for re-posing the question at the end. I have to remind myself of it frequently. 
(I haven't really made any friends at my new job but I have to remind myself, none of my friends work at my old place of employment anymore either, so I'd have been getting paid less with still no friends.)

Stay awesome, and we should totally catch up.