SAYING NO TO EVERYTHING BUT YOU DREAM. by nonsowrites

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hive-190212 · @nonsowrites · Mar 8 '21

$20.49

SAYING NO TO EVERYTHING BUT YOU DREAM.

![21746d916cc6a5f429a4137e116a5439c6106492ed6cf0283eafd05c6901d62f.0.gif](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/nonsowrites/AJrDge7Zxw3XtxgxuwA5NwPXKp8LVkRnjVbUzf5kdtiGPxz845YQcHQFsHr3Q2G.gif)

The other day I was watching a clip from one of Jordan Peterson's interviews where he spoke about what it takes to be successful and on the top of his list was a sacrifice.

He analyzed the lives of some of the most successful people in the world, highlighting how they sacrificed time for leisure or even time to commune with their loved ones and dedicated to their life's purpose--one they had defined.

This, he explained, is the reason why it feels alone at the top. First of all, not everyone gets to the top (or is willing to sacrifice to get there). Secondly, the process of getting there takes a lot from you (most times everything but your goal).

A lot of what he said resonated with me. It takes a certain level of commitment to thrive especially when you don't come from a place with a lot of privileges. Even then you still do need to show your worth.

Like I have said in previous posts, success is a game against time. Timing is crucial. You can execute a fantastic idea at the wrong time and it amounts to nothing. So to even the odds in your favor you need to be ready at all times and that's difficult.

The other option is to do more with less time. This is where dedication and dexterity come into play. This is the work the average person is unwilling to do. This is where you get to shine.

The other part of succeeding covers relationships with people. This part is even more important than the former. It is impossible to succeed at anything without well-defined relationships.

Our interaction with our environment determines, to a length extent, how well we perform in life.

Yesterday while in church, the preacher talked about his relationship with the people. He mentioned that his greatest flaw was his inability to say 'no' to people--especially the ones close to him-- and that cost him a lot until he changed.

His story reflects my reality. I am in a similar position where I find it difficult to say no to the people I care about. It seems right to sacrifice everything for the people I carry about but that comes at a great price. One more costly than a 'no'.

Dilemma: I don't want to gain the world(world) and lose the love of the people I care about.

Not all sacrifices are worth making. I have learnt this the hard way. And yes it will be extremely difficult turning down the people you care about but if that is the price for a better life for you and them then it is worth doing.

Learn to say no to expedient things. It is the price to pay for the life you want. Cheers!

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@bdcommunity · Mar 9 '21

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@noloafing · Mar 8 '21

While I'm really not a fan of Peterson, that idea of saying no is so very important.

If you are serious about this type of idea, Derek Sivers has **a lot** to say about saying no

https://sive.rs/no2

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@nonsowrites · Mar 8 '21

Why aren't you a fan of Peterson if I may ask?

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@noloafing · Mar 8 '21

He's a misogynist and has very reductive thinking to do with gender roles. Here are a couple links over the years after a quick search:
- https://torontolife.com/city/u-t-professor-sparked-vicious-battle-gender-neutral-pronouns/
- Thinks women "want to be dominated" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eV4iXfjonqI&t=380s
- That is something wrong with women that having kids isn't the most important thing in their lives in their 20s - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NV2yvI4Id9Q&t=450s

I'm sure there are more out there. While he may have interesting thoughts on a lot of things, I'm not sure that I'm interesting in learning from someone that has such rigid and harmful values.

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3 replies