I had a conversation with a man (who was presumably from Okinawa) about kigo over the weekend and he said that in Okinawa they basically can’t use them. It’s like living in Florida or Mexico or somewhere else tropical where there is basically one season, so the typical Japanese kigo words often can’t be used there. 

The Japanese language reads and functions so differently than English. I think even with their very brief, very image based poems that they still read like full sentences. Often with Japanese, things aren’t marked as specifically as they are in English so you naturally fill in the gaps whereas with English, without the particles and pronouns, etc. we’re often left scratching our heads. 

With the workshop poems, my preference falls somewhere between the two versions.

I try to get around to reading all the poems, but I sometimes miss some. Please feel free to tag me if you have any haiku questions next time so I don't miss them (or so my chances of missing them decrease, anyway).

The rules for syllables is very arbitrary. Most English speakers who haven't studied in depth will say it's necessary. Most haiku scholars disagree. But you know how that works. People who learn a little but not a lot will argue until they are blue in the face. So thus the 5/7/5 "requirement" in English haiku. I ignore these people, but they are usually very loud so I understand it's tough for people who don't know as much about the form to ignore. 

All that said, if you want to stick to using the 5/7/5 count, you are the judge of how many syllables a word has. So using the southern "wahl" is fine. 

The main thing is 5/7/5 in Japanese is much *shorter* than 5/7/5 in English. One word in Japanese can be 5 mora (not a syllable), so that wipes out the entire first line right there. As a result of this, yeah, the Japanese often (but not always) drops prepositions. Japanese doesn't have articles. They won't drop conjunctions, but they will try to reword the haiku not to need them. 

I wrote a post about this once. See: https://peakd.com/hive-161465/@dbooster/seventeen-syllables-the-form-of

I love all of these:

**_overcast morn,  
steaming coffee,  
haiku appear_**

**_leaves flutter  
time passes slowly  
coffee shop_**

**_poppies -  
first frittilaria  
then lilies_**

Well done!!

>but if I put on my rubbers
and have eaten some blubber

This has great tempo to it. I could never do haikus. I just ramble too much, but you do it with great class.

This is also my favorite
**My closet holds plenty of coats,
my backyard is chock full of goats,
but if I put on my rubbers
and have eaten some blubber
my stomach has way too much bloat!**

Three interesting poems, in which the everyday life of the lyrical speaker is present. Greetings

Beautiful collection. 


poppies -
first frittilaria
then lilies

This one is powerful.



Japanese haiku is written in kanji(Chinese Characters); this means that in addition to the literal meaning there is also a pictorial meaning. The syllable thing is generally thought of as a western affectation but it does create lovely rhythm. The key to really functional haiku from my understanding is 3 things ... (1)it must be linked to nature/season ... (2)brevity ... (3)and have at least 2 meanings, literal and analogous. Haiku is about metaphor. Through metaphor it serves enlightenment. 

Your works are ALL enlightening.

> poppies -
first frittilaria
then lilies

It's a lovely exercise, to write first and then scratch the little words. It's the rough wood bowl, sanded and whittled and polished.


![IMG20231022121709.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/riverflows/23uQrpWFncza7JrDXe96T2Y4nt8YNK4kjAgkJr1UWjhPeYN3QXaXg5aXmDqLKniQ6VKyi.jpg)