It all started with a photograph of a surf break on Tassies East Coast. In the surfing world, there's a whole thing about secret surf breaks and not telling people, so the crowds stay away. In this age of internet, drones and so on, there's little chance any break will actually remain secret, but the joke still remains: if I told you, I'd have to kill you. 

Anyone in their right MIND knows this is a joke.

A quick internet search informs me it originally came from Sherlock Holmes:

> Doctor: Oh, Mr. Holmes, I would love to tell you, but then, of course, I'd have to kill you.
Sherlock: That would be tremendously ambitious of you.

In fact its so common it's been used in a ton of movies. Thanks Quora for leading me to this:

https://youtu.be/VuE_jqYNi3c

However, Facebook saw it as threatening and put me in jail for 24 hours. I immediately appealed and they still said nope, it's a violation of community standards.

Horrified and angered, I shared the screenshot of my comment under my original post. Oops. Jailtime AGAIN. For talking about it! 

What the actual? So, a few days later, I saw mate had been banned for an equally ridiculous thing. He was arguing a point about climate change and said the guy was 'stupid' if he didn't look at the data he was referring to. I commented with my story as per below. 

![IMG_20220422_142333.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/riverflows/23wXNumhUNcQLLUiypM8JS7Bc74jMyuED4h7YeYJruNFj5AQ5iidofm3pQxLkmngfuCSD.jpg)

Yep, back in jail. Just for talking about it. Not only that, this:


![Screenshot_2022-04-22-13-27-39-35.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/riverflows/23u6Z4abU4Rt27HxEkcrwfuGAjxkghjvi96grVNXiMaSpoCyHpgrNGJmRAiHQdGCjF38M.jpg)

Third violation DIDNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. It was the same thing, just I'd been banned from even TALKING about it. I dare not even talk in code lest I be banned again. I don't want to be as I share my travel stories and photos with friends and family there, let alone community groups I'm part of. I'm a social girl online and as much as I hate Facebook, there isn't an alternative that my friends and family would all shift to. As much as I enjoy HIVE, it doesn't function the same way.

So here I am, muffled, muzzled and muted on Facebook for a joke. It feels horrible. There's no repeal either, and whoever is behind the screen is making arbitrary decisions that dont make sense. It's algorithms to begin with, I get that. I was probably flagged for the word 'kill'. But the context of the word begs anyone in their right mind to see the cultural and global JOKE. So is it STILL algorithms just going NUP? 

Its right royally pissed me off. I am infuriated by injustice at best of times and hate being misunderstood. And now I'm on their watchlist, so have to be on best behaviour lest I look at someone funny in my gardening group for using chemical fertilisers. Fuck me. I think they might be picking on the wrong person. I'm hardly a neo Nazi broccoli grower now am I? 

Fighting against a monolith like Facebook is pointless, I know. But it's still depressing. And I'm not even speaking truth, brah - I was just threatening to kill nephew 😂. Well, he always did think I was gangsta.


![5uwqrf.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/riverflows/Ep1WU642MV5SREUyF3VuwHK5tJ9K84n9CtcTEbeXhdHw2ar9fuucpq7917SN8sMgtFv.jpg)


Time for a self imposed Facebook jail, limiting my use to once a week and on my PC only. Take that, Fuckbook. 

And if anyone disagrees with my decision, I'd have to kill them.


![db00b49f94a8f354bb464591e6260346--memes.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/riverflows/AJizr891dggFMTqQo3bxeGpqf6JmBe9kv41DpFVEtMPQFG7cHrm66dPYey5F5wz.jpg)


Wait, what's that? I'm still here? That's because I can say stuff like that on HIVE and not be banned. Sure, I might be downvoted out of visibility, but that's only if y'all don't get the joke.

Gulp.