I was in the line at JC Penny's, the check out girl glanced up at me and gave me a very nice smile, she was a doll, wow! While I was waiting she looked at me again and smiled, I thought I had something going here maybe, when I got to the front I told her, "It's nice to finally meet you!" She smiled again and said, "Nice to meet you too!" She had to like me, right?!?
                   Then I started talking, I don't know what I was saying, I was babbling like I always do, at one point I told her she should call up the fire chief where I used to work and he could tell her I was a good guy, it's all a nightmarish haze, I just can't talk to girls.
                  I asked her for her number and she said she couldn't give it out at work but she would take mine, I was amazed at that. She didn't call me for a week and I figured, what's new, I blew it when I opened my mouth, but lo and behold, 3 weeks after I met her, she called me. It was Saturday afternoon and I asked her out for that night, I wanted a date with her so badly, and as soon as possible. She told me she had a Mexican Club Dance at 10 but she could go out with me before that. I told her I'd meet her at the Stratosphere at 7 and take her to dinner at "The Top of the World Restaurant" . I'd been there before, the food was decent and the view was spectacular. 
                         Well I spent a ton on dinner, the bill for our photographs was 220 bucks alone. This is one of them!https://s20.postimg.org/qe9o7v4pp/stratosphere_date.jpg
                          I thought we had a pretty good time, I tried my best to be funny, she mostly talked about how great  the Mexican Club Dance was going to be and how the men all lined up to dance with her. I can't blame them. At the end of dinner, we stood up and I tried to give her a hug but she put some sort of deft maneuver on me and somehow it wound up being just a handshake. 
                          I texted her that night to see if she got home okay and I texted her the next day but she never texted me back. While we were talking at dinner she told me she worked as a maid part time to supplement her income, she was a single mother with 2 kids. I figured what the hell so a month later I texted her and asked if she would like to clean my apartment, I'd give her 100 bucks for 4 hours of work, she said okay.
                      I totally cleaned the apartment before she got there, I didn't want her to think I was a slob. When she did get to my place she was pretty much all business, cleaning up what little needed to be cleaned, I tried to talk to her but when I did she always seemed to have to vacuum something. I told her I had some errands to run, (that was true) and that I would pick us up some lunch, this seemed to brighten her up a bit and she told me to go to Roberto's and get her a veggie burrito. I thought to myself, "Okay, she just wants to get the work done, then we can have lunch."   
                     Well I got back a couple of hours later and she was finishing up, she told me she had gotten everything done early and there was nothing left to do so she grabbed the lunch I bought and the hundred bucks and took off. I ate my chicken burrito alone. 
                  The next month I texted her and asked if she wanted to clean my apartment again, she said "Sure!" She came over and I was trying to talk to her over the vacuum when she turned it off and told me nicely, "Don't you have any errands to run or anything?" She said it very sweetly. I just said "Oh yeah, I do." She asked me if I could please give her the hundred before I left so I wouldn't have to rush to get back, she said she would be sure to lock up.
                     So I took off with nowhere to go, just driving around, finally to save gas I stopped in a parking lot and called up a friend of mine who knew the whole story, I told him that she kicked me out of the apartment and I was in a 7-11 parking lot waiting until she was done so I could go back. We were laughing at what an asshole I was.
                      A couple of months later I texted her to come over and clean the place again, lol, I couldn't get enough. She texted me back that she had quit doing maid work because she had a new boyfriend who was a cop and he didn't want her to do that anymore. Well, I finally let go, at least she never had to hit me with the vacuum cleaner or anything, but I think she probably wanted to...