When it comes to successful relationships, we’ve been told time and time again that **compromise is key**.

 In order to create a fulfilling and lasting one,  you need to set aside your needs and think in terms of your partners.  After all, their **happiness is just as important as yours**.

From trivial matters like choosing what **movie to watch , to deciding on important factors like sharing responsibilities and choosing where to live**, mastering the art of compromise isn’t easy but it’s crucial.

It all comes down to deciding whether you want to be **right or to be happy**.


![toa-heftiba-214340.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmRNJNuJXwtdNBBiaV5UuGQroaxHspPj4dWK2fheLqu5rk/toa-heftiba-214340.jpg)
[unsplash](https://unsplash.com/photos/oKbQxVusp8M)


Yet, there’s one thing you should never compromise on : 

# Your Core Values
<b>

Think of your core values as your **North Star**. Your own personal compass that prevents you from drifting off into the beaten path and into one more aligned with who you are. 

Unlike broad values like : friendship, love, family, your core values are your **unique set of beliefs**. 

They can be externally or culturally influenced as well. 

They aren't **shoulds** or **woulds** their  **wants** and **needs**.

They're the **visions that play out in your mind**. They're the **voids in your life**. The **envy** you get from certain people.

From financial freedom, to commitment and shared responsibilities, chances are you and your partner **are not going to value the same thing at the same level**.

Which is why , it's super important to write down **you top 5 core values** and **rate them on a scale of 1-5  in terms of importance (1- lowest 5 highest)** to assess whether they can be aligned or not.

Issues surface when one partner's core values are at  the polar opposite end of their partners.

![freestocks-org-82348 (1).jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmb7T2q9nWpBepixCuYis66sgHVixjD18enKwJRt2XBhXs/freestocks-org-82348%20(1).jpg)
[unsplash](https://unsplash.com/photos/kv4OM426JYg)

**For instance**:

One  partner brought up in a traditional family, might have **marriage at the top of their core values** while their partner who **highly values freedom**, can't understand the importance behind a wedding.

In this case, their polar opposite values will inevitably be a huge source of conflict.

While the freedom loving partner may come around eventually, there's no guarantee of it. The partner who values marriage will have a difficult time compromising their own beliefs in order to appease their partners. 

In fact, they'll be miserable about it. The only way for this relationship to thrive is whether one partner's values suddenly shifts in importance based on the stage they're at in their life or whether losing them outweighs their values.


Unfortunately, **time isn't always on our side**. 

While finding someone with similar values is always a good idea, it's not always the case when we wind up falling in love with someone whose values are different than ours.

![pablo-heimplatz-257552.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWHdwg1W5jSnjk2YdNJRu6hAGtwA77dbCz78M4KKCiTEE/pablo-heimplatz-257552.jpg)
[unsplash](https://unsplash.com/photos/kv4OM426JYg)

People come into our lives to [challenge our highest values](https://psiloveyou.xyz/the-way-to-their-heart-is-through-their-values-45c4b55d0234). Sometimes, they're meant to play a temporary role, others times a more permanent one.

Compromising your own core values, is like compromising a part of who you are. 

# Choose yourself, before compromising who you are for another person