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There are so many things I've learned in life, but what I've learned over the last few years is something I'd like to share in this blog post. Why? you might ask. It's purely because these last couple of years have been difficult ones for me mentally, emotionally and physically. It's when things don't go our way that we tend to take the time to sit back and try to understand what's happening with us. When everything is going our way we just ride the wave, feel the exhilaration of the moment and forget to learn much from them. 

**Why is this important?**

It is important that we take time to understand life if not we might just pass through life without consciously learning much. It is also essential that we learn from what is happening to us so we do not commit the same mistakes repeatedly. 

**My five lessons**

**Family is the most important thing in life**. "Well you have a great family so its easy for you to say this," is what I often hear when I share this thought with friends. Let's be honest no one has a perfect family, just as no human is perfect no family is perfect. Regardless, family is the one that rallies around us in the time of our greatest need. We could have major disagreements and even conflicts within the family but when we are in trouble its our family which steps in someway to help; if not all at least some members do.

**Friends may not always stand by you**.  Friends like all things universal are temporary. There are of course exceptions to the rule. As long as you don't expect anything from friendship except the companionship of the person you will never be hurt. It's expectations that kill all relationships and friendships are not exempt from this. Life takes us in different directions it is possible that we drift further from each other as time goes by.  Let's enjoy friendships as long as they last. 

**Surround yourself with the right kind of people**. Pleasant words may soothe your ear and give you  a sense of well being, but it is sure to trip you down.  Remember that those who have a personal agenda need to clothe their words with sweet sounding phrases while those who speak in plain words don't have to add the extra sweetness. While sounding harsh they may still have your best interest in mind. These are people who have nothing to hide and you have nothing to fear from this kind. The flattering kinds hide you from yourself. They prevent you from knowing yourself.

**It's okay to break certain relationships**  Relationships like all other things human are temporary. Some relationships last till the grave but these are special and to expect all relationships (even well selected ones) to be special is foolishness. It takes a lot of courage and wisdom to decide on what you want to carry forward and which you need to break lose from. If you have given the decision sufficient thought, been unbiased and considerate in your judgement you will be fine. When you leave a relationship in anger, hatred and bitterness you could most certainly be wrong. If you don't let your ego make these decisions for you, you could be on the right path.  Remember that no two people make a perfect pair, even soulmates have their moments of conflict but they always try to resolve their problems rather make it a show of strength. I have personally walked out of friendships because I could no longer relate to the other persons point of view. We grow and change with our life experiences, it's unfair to expect others to change at the same pace as we do in all fairness. 

**Face your flaws**. All of us are flawed and we are all learning and growing as long as we have breath. This just means we are filling in the blanks where there is a gap in knowledge. When we face our flaws we accept our human frailty and decide to fill in the gap with stronger / better behavior which helps us to adapt more easily to our environment. This is a tough one purely because we love to live sheltered lives, but the sooner we face this the better for us. The fear of facing ourselves disappears quickly making it possible to embrace ourselves for who we are. This doesn't mean we make any exemption for our flaws but that we take into account our flaws and how we plan to deal with them. 

**Conclusion**
No rule is hard and fast or written in stone. What works for me may not work for you. Nonetheless most of these are generic experiences, common to all human beings. The only things I feel that we cannot compromise on are letting our ego and our emotions (like anger, jealousy, hatred, bitterness and revenge) take over our reasoning ability. These definitely blind our eyes and stop our personal growth.

Image used belongs to me