https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2017/08/28/06/33/nail-art-2688559_960_720.jpg

[In this case, you both have issues:](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/7zuhwv/my26f_boyfriend32m_tells_me_my_happiness_and/):

>Tldr; Boyfriend constantly dismisses my concerns and my feelings as being in my head or not reality. Uses stupid phrases every time like "it's in the past" or "your feelings are your problem" to deflect and avoid any responsibility. Never wants to agree or listen or say sorry. ******, thought partners are supposed to care and want to change for the health of the relationship. Is he right? Or is he an ***?  [...]  I called him today because he never makes an effort to call, text, or to drive to me. In the last 8 months he has driven to me twice. We live an hour apart. I called him to tell him "I wish you would respond to my messages, and initiate calls and texts more often". Nicely and without attacking. It ended up turning into an argument because he automatically said "it's in the past, I'm sick of talking about things from the past" and " you ruin nice days with your same ********". Then told me he was going to hang up if I continue. Somehow it being in the past makes the issue invalid?! Its not even that far in the past! And yeah, maybe I am ruining a nice moment, but it doesn't mean he can just block me from talking! I should have a chance to say what I need to say and be listened to.  [...]  Then he goes on to say that I create these issues in my head and that I can choose to call him and see him and be positive. He told me to see a therapist because my feelings are not his to rationalize. That just ****** ****** me off. First, he expects me to ignore my feelings for the sake of forced positivety. Second he devalues my feelings and the issues I have by saying its in my head.  [...]  I'm so angry. All he ever does is deflect. This happens every time I try to bring up anything that I think he does wrong or something that doesnt make me happy. He never says sorry, listens, or agrees to change. Every time I'm finally able to get through to him he either gets extremely angry or he says that that's just how he is and that he sucks and everyone hates him(trying to make me feel bad and automatically forgive him? I dont know).Yet he has the benefit of making his problems lead to me saying sorry or me being understanding. I'm so sick of him using all these lines every. single. time

I feel you're not ready to be in a relationship.  In addition, all you're doing is frustrating him and he's too cowardly to end it.  If a person frustrated me, like you frustrate him, it would be over.  He's right that you need to get over yourself, but the fact that he reacts with anger shows that he has problems dealing with your immaturity.

You need to learn how to better handle your expectations.  Ironically, what you're complaining about attracts you to him and your rant is really just a pattern you've gotten into where you get frustrated with him, but return to him.  If he's really this much trouble to you, you would have ended it a long time ago.  Thus validation-seeking.  This is your pattern.  Enjoy misery!

*Image h/t Pixabay*