I looked for when I should not, I wanted even after the agony, and I loved even when it hurt ... by strangerwolf

english · @strangerwolf · Apr 16 '18

I looked for when I should not, I wanted even after the agony, and I loved even when it hurt ...

## <center>Search without searching.</center>

Search without searching, I craved without craving, I loved without wanting, I loved without knowing, I remembered and it hurt. I cried and my heart muffled it, each tear broke me, my heartbeat accelerated again, my constant oblivion for a stormy memory, and the allusion that appears at night as an illusion.

That blinds my reason, and with pain ... sweetens my heart again. Those nights where I was totally thirsty, for his love. Even I still love her, still there, sheltered in my heart, although every time I remember such a thing I feel a twinge in my chest, I can not breathe, but even so, I can not forget ... I'm sorry, it's pathetic on my part,  I know.

> **But you always remind me "what; I searched without seeking, I craved without craving, I loved without wanting, I loved without knowing, and as I loved, I will never love."**

> I must accept, that you will never be there, and that I must continue, I have a hard way to go, one where your absence is present, and at the same time it makes me stronger ...

<center>![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmPbquyTzVxrJZTKsZeuBqrrqdwVVmtHq5kVaYeYnh1ZJK/image.png)</center> <center>[Source](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/459930180680866517/)</center>


![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmevJy5nxWEFkFrKaiWDx2udqYtb5xPGargP3FpofhP7Vf/image.png)

### Hello! I'm StrangerWoolf, a little writer, I'm glad you got here, thanks for reading, come back soon ... ~ ♥

In case you want to follow me on one of my social networks here I leave you [My Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/Stranwolf/)

<center>![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmXrkDBjNwPKo8ELGmWumnFfjiM8b2pWT87ehEeKW8CRvQ/image.png)</center> <center>[Source](https://weheartit.com/entry/220548751)</center>
![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmcPAAw81nK2Txtwy3D1CGLH7uXDsgUtbjh3CaMgU5HoRYQ/image.png)

👍 access106, snrt, eyr5, ubg, dmiton, marokin, lyubi

`author`	strangerwolf
`permlink`	i-looked-for-when-i-should-not-i-wanted-even-after-the-agony-and-i-loved-even-when-it-hurt
`category`	english
`json_metadata`	{"tags":["english","writing","life","curation","art"],"image":["https://steemitimages.com/DQmPbquyTzVxrJZTKsZeuBqrrqdwVVmtHq5kVaYeYnh1ZJK/image.png","https://steemitimages.com/DQmevJy5nxWEFkFrKaiWDx2udqYtb5xPGargP3FpofhP7Vf/image.png","https://steemitimages.com/DQmXrkDBjNwPKo8ELGmWumnFfjiM8b2pWT87ehEeKW8CRvQ/image.png","https://steemitimages.com/DQmcPAAw81nK2Txtwy3D1CGLH7uXDsgUtbjh3CaMgU5HoRYQ/image.png"],"links":["https://www.pinterest.com/pin/459930180680866517/","https://www.facebook.com/Stranwolf/","https://weheartit.com/entry/220548751"],"app":"steemit/0.1","format":"markdown"}
`created`	2018-04-16 22:46:21
`last_update`	2018-04-16 22:46:21
`depth`	0
`children`	1
`last_payout`	2018-04-23 22:46:21
`cashout_time`	1969-12-31 23:59:59
`total_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`curator_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`pending_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`promoted`	0.000 HBD
`body_length`	1,848
`author_reputation`	55,091,591,427
`root_title`	"I looked for when I should not, I wanted even after the agony, and I loved even when it hurt ..."
`beneficiaries`	`[]`
`max_accepted_payout`	1,000,000.000 HBD
`percent_hbd`	10,000
`post_id`	50,459,665
`net_rshares`	1,964,242,909
`author_curate_reward`	""

properties (23)vote details (7)

voter	rshares	pct
ubg	305,334,630	1%
lyubi	52,789,547	100%
dmiton	58,844,885	1%
marokin	54,205,861	100%
access106	535,458,157	100%
snrt	489,513,012	100%
eyr5	468,096,817	100%

`author`	a-0-0
`permlink`	re-strangerwolf-i-looked-for-when-i-should-not-i-wanted-even-after-the-agony-and-i-loved-even-when-it-hurt-20180416t224628832z
`category`	english
`json_metadata`	{"tags":["english"],"users":["a-0-0"],"app":"steemit/0.1"}
`created`	2018-04-16 22:46:30
`last_update`	2018-04-16 22:46:30
`depth`	1
`children`	0
`last_payout`	2018-04-23 22:46:30
`cashout_time`	1969-12-31 23:59:59
`total_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`curator_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`pending_payout_value`	0.000 HBD
`promoted`	0.000 HBD
`body_length`	28
`author_reputation`	-4,863,186,238,920
`root_title`	"I looked for when I should not, I wanted even after the agony, and I loved even when it hurt ..."
`beneficiaries`	`[]`
`max_accepted_payout`	1,000,000.000 HBD
`percent_hbd`	10,000
`post_id`	50,459,680
`net_rshares`	-613,512,203
`author_curate_reward`	""