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>Not bad.

That is my experience with the new office we moved into today. It is a new building, newly fit and has some nice areas. And while it is a flexi-space, it isn't open plan, which means we largely work in small groups behind glass. Weirdly, I prefer the open office plan more. 

It wasn't all smooth sailing though, as there are three apps required to use the office. A parking app, a key app, and a space booking app. Two out if three worked for me, but I eventually got the key app working, though it is quite clunky. So, I grabbed a physical key fob also, so it is easier, and faster. 


![1000047222.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/23wX1cnkP5k6XezxCxPw5aFP7sUHp5GCT42zkpGTudmVpd8kzjbCQkgp4dv6E6e2baiWs.jpg)

When I arrived, there was a range of preparedness of people, with most having it sorted prior, and some yet to install anything at all. What was interesting to observe was the various levels of disruption people seemed to feel. 

The unprepared knew they were unprepared, but some of them got annoyed at the complication of getting apps, finding access strings and copy-pasting. But it was the prepared who seemed the most disrupted, because little things didn't work exactly as *they expected* them to work. It seemed that their preparedness gave them some kind of false sense of certainty that because they had followed the instructions, everything would go as they had imagined. And as you can imagine, in a IT company full of people who may or not appear somewhere on the autism spectrum, these little roadblocks visibly frustrated them more than they probably should have. 

I get it though, because we are generally upset when out expectations aren't met, but it is worse when we are expecting safety. For a lot of people, that sense of safety disappears when there is any level of uncertainty, and some of these people need a lot of clarity. Under normal conditions, it is possible, but there are always degrees of change that will happen and it comes down to the amount of change a person can handle, or the type of change.

I was semi-prepared, but I did feel a little anxiety or nerves as I drove into the underground parking, and as I went up the elevator, with everyone struggling with the app, mine not working at all. It had a *first day of school* vibe. 

> I am not the cool kid.

Never have been, though I am "cool adjacent" these days. Not one of those people that everyone gathers around, but not the person who is avoided. I think this is a good place for me, 

> Out of the spotlight, but not in the dark.

Was just discussing with a friend that I wish I was more 007, more *cool, calm, and collected.* It is not that I get flustered that easily, especially professionally. But wouldn't it be great to never be emotionally disrupted? No matter what happens, there is always the clarity of mind to look for an alternative option, a way out of any predicament. 

What I noted, was that my "007-ness" depends more on who is around me at the time. For example, if the people are colleagues, I will act with more calmly than if I am with my wife. And, when my wife and I were dating early on, I would have acted calmly then too, with very little "getting to me" at that stage. I think it is like if I stub my toe with people around, or when by myself, when by myself, I curse and get on with it - when people are around, the drama lasts longer.

And this came to mind as I watched some people today, as if they were by themselves, I wonder if they would act differently when they were "hurt" by the disruption. Would they be as anxious, or would they get on with it? I wonder how much of public anxiety is driven by social expectations and what we might think that others think of us?

>I suspect quite a lot.

Likely, *most of us* don't lose our shit in front of strangers, because we care about what those strangers might think of us. But, in the comfort of familiars, we are more willing to be free with our emotions. But, when we are alone and can be as free as we want, we just suck it up, because there is no one there to listen to us complain, or give us sympathy. 

In the workplace, most people have some sense of professional understanding, that they can't act *completely* like toddlers throwing tantrums, so they hold some level of decorum. Yet, I feel that this is also changing, as there has been more of a drive to "express emotions" regardless of the harm it will do, whether to oneself, or to others. 

> Look at the increase and escalation in road rage incidents.

As we are whittling away the social fabric, the social checks and balances that keep us civil are wearing down also and, more and more people are losing their shit, as if it is acceptable behavior. And, with the decrease in our patience due to the increase in our consumption of short-form consumables and other digital factors, there are an increasing number of opportunities to get frustrated.

>Like waiting for an elevator door to close. 

*How fucking slow...*

Who we surround ourselves with matters, and ultimately, we want to be surrounded by those who support us to be our best. This doesn't always mean the people who will support us blindly, and it could mean people who we don't even like, because there are plenty of lessons to learn that can help improve us, that come from sources we wouldn't choose ourselves. The workplace is one of those places, as there tends to be a range of personalities to observe and interact with, from people who we might not choose to spend our time with normally. 

What I have found, is that I enjoy spending *some time* with a range of people in the workplace, even though the majority of my time is spent with people I prefer to be with. There are also various dynamics in the workplace with mixed groups of people that interact differently together, depending on who is there at the time, or if someone else joins mid-conversation.

> It is fascinating. 

Yet, there is a lot of uncertainty, a lot of variables, and a lot of room for "trigger events" to happen, that disrupt our desired run of show. Events outside of our expectations.

After a month out of the office, and then the dramas of the heating issues we had at the house, it really was nice to be back with colleagues who for the most part, where positive and curious about the new premises, and the opportunities it holds. 

And the coffee is *much better* than it was.

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]


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