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Tomorrow is the last day.

*Smallsteps' last day of daycare.*

Come August, she will be moving on to preschool and because we moved two years ago a couple of kilometers, the preschool will be in another suburb, so her best friend, won't be there. Up until now, we have been transporting to and from morning and evening by car, which creates a challenge when either my wife or I are working at the office, as we are (thankfully) a one car family. The preschool (and future primary school) is less than a kilometer away, so well within walking distance and in time, she will be able to walk herself. This makes things a lot easier for us with scheduling. 

*At least I hope.*

![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/23vsL1tA7piHcAf14eqxBAQHfNAdQ2QsDTnH3NN2PMFRruJQvDxQk3DxeAm4b45pWFBzr.png)

I don't think it has really hit her yet that tomorrow is the last day, but I am pretty sure that it has been weighing on her mind, as she is nervous about starting at the new school, worried about losing her friend and unsure about what to expect in general. For her, it is a very big life change - probably the largest in her young life so far. 

*It seems silly for an adult* perhaps, but it is far more than the nerves of starting a new job, for as far as Smallsteps is aware, her teacher has always been there, her friend always by her side - they are family. She doesn't yet connect that she might not see her daycare teachers again and that daily contact with her friend will become weekly, maybe monthly, as lives fork apart. 

*She has been at the daycare for 66% of her life so far.*

>I remember her first day.

![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/2423uzoxV2djWici3QjnFMY8DP5wERK5jHiXr1MRUizqYgT4Cs9Agb3Q5xXrz7NT5fDTW.png)

And those tiny little Nike shoes, *we still have.*

>And my wife walking her down the path from our old apartment toward the daycare.


![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/23xAVg6EjZQDbTimh9iQXPSRs72zNKev2D6QK8Xk2RbDmtVZyQQbpUfdZHjyGuTScwfrs.png)

We used to have so much fun walking to and from daycare together and I would take the opportunity to have mini adventures with her then, talking about all kinds of things, negotiating whether we will go straight home or stop in one of the little parks with swings and a slide... 

>Just for a moment.

She found daycare strange at first, because so many of the children were barely speaking at the time and she was fluent in two languages. It made it difficult for her to engage with the children, so she took on the role of a teacher instead. This also meant that the teachers treated her a little differently too, because they could communicate so clearly with her, that she was often left to her own devices, while they tended to the others. 

>Will this have an effect on her later in life?

She won't remember it, but since so much brain structure is built in those formative years, *everything* has *some* effect, even if it can't be traced back to a particular period or single event. I know that my first day of kindergarten had an effect on me - and *I do* remember it from when I was four. Smallsteps will very likely remember this last day too.

But, with holidays ahead together for the next month or so, she won't have too much time to dwell on it and we will spend time swimming and travelling, having more mini adventures along the way. We will also practice going to the preschool, so the trip is familiar for her, the routine in place, rather than the shock of the first day being all new.

I probably don't get to be there to pick her up tomorrow for her last day, something I will probably remember for the rest of my life - but, this is the role I have too as a parent and, there will be other things that will arrive that I will both be there for and, miss along the way.

>Disappointment. 

*It's part of growing up.*

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]


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