![1440733929244698405.png](https://steemitimages.com/DQmSdHhFs4hc3mMterZCnEn5QiZKsqMggzzucE3DwLR52BF/1440733929244698405.png)

You may remember in a previous 'Useless Tech' post, we included some potty gadgets to help you poop. Well here is the Toilet edition of useless tech with all its floating depravity.

![talking-toilet-paper-holder.png](https://steemitimages.com/DQmZL231211jCzALUymBA6gLFKJwHn4tCnqmeZP93ZmRaaB/talking-toilet-paper-holder.png)

1 – Imagine you're sat on the loo enjoying a good ol squeeze of the cheese. And you are rudely interrupted by a voice directing insults a you. This talking toilet roll holder is a good gag to 'shit' your friends or wife up. It has an internal battery and ability to add your own insults. Completely pointless but funny at the same time.

![toilet-seat-scale-feat-1-360x240.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmXRnUFhxykAajWefwsn3GRmanGQp3oCPA5QTuJmAAcR5j/toilet-seat-scale-feat-1-360x240.jpg)

2 – How weight conscious are you? Do you always count the last ounce? Perhaps you're a fitness freak who shaves their legs before a bike ride? Well now when you visit the crapper to release that turtle head, you can measure your weight with the toilet scales. With a convenient digital display you can measure the weight of that poop.

![b57cb3fe060b4e365f4756e99b2b4287w-c247760xd-w685_h860_q80.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWucRH2auF6pwRtsSdzsbxmsxkbAzJGPC4tCsY7E8J7Ey/b57cb3fe060b4e365f4756e99b2b4287w-c247760xd-w685_h860_q80.jpg)

3 – You remember the old school horror films with the cliche electrical appliance in the tub that electrocutes them to death right? But what if you are so addicted to your tablet or phone you can't bare to shower without it? Well now you can buy a Shower curtain with a tablet pocket. Yes, you can now watch endless porn while in the bathroom, continue shopping on eBay or video call your parents while scrubbing your arse... oh you might destroy your tablet in the process tho.

![b57cb3fe060b4e365f4756e99b2b4287w-c247771xd-w685_h860_q80.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmUK5Qkd775JCrLddXx4yq2jUj8eBbwHSWBEY5ZGrGabky/b57cb3fe060b4e365f4756e99b2b4287w-c247771xd-w685_h860_q80.jpg)

4 – The toilet has been around since the early Roman empire. You sit on it and drop the kids off at the pool. Its been good enough for a good 3000 years. But according to Squatty Potty we've been constipating all wrong. This handy 'step' raises your legs so you can be a little less constipated while you drop a floater. I mean I enjoy a good crap. Time to chill, have a smoke and read your emails. I'm fairly happy with how I shit.

![Scented_Illustr_Callouts_741x541.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmStxsjwMqsqbhJ7xTsRnfX12z8SpBtK2Y5bWWEsZWLhnF/Scented_Illustr_Callouts_741x541.jpg)

5 – Now once I get off the toilet and someone walks past, I make a joke about the smell. More so the kids, but this is a semi good idea I think, it doesn't take into account lazy men whose aim isn't all that good tho. This oder eater for your toilet will spray some god awful countryside cow manure smell to replace the rotten cabbage and vomit smell left in the sun for a week smell. And together combine and create a green haze of nuclear waste that can make a 3 eyed gold fish. I personally just spray some air freshener at the door and then let someone else gag on the smell once they taste it..... think I went I a little far then.


And there is a slew of toilet tech that is even worse.

Don't forget to upvote and follow for more useless tech.

Thanks for reading 

@TechMojo


![DQmZLBCsLuXuWLcpzUUdaHZyBy9jyHQHtuP5722u9jiVntu_1680x8400.png](https://steemitimages.com/DQmZLBCsLuXuWLcpzUUdaHZyBy9jyHQHtuP5722u9jiVntu/DQmZLBCsLuXuWLcpzUUdaHZyBy9jyHQHtuP5722u9jiVntu_1680x8400.png)