Have You Ever Heard The Word Spotlight Effect? by tpkidkai

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hive-166408 · @tpkidkai · Mar 24 '23

$13.13

Have You Ever Heard The Word Spotlight Effect?




![pexels-lucas-allmann-460918.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/23t6zoN7mtTSt9UAvSeqf9eCxhfgVn9xgnDY3jMGT9WC8ypu6Tzka3JbFjFMpx99UyyxV.jpg)

<center> Photo by [Lucas Allmann](https://www.pexels.com/photo/grayscale-photo-of-a-man-460918/) </center>

While working on the guest list for my podcast, I encountered the term *spotlight effect*. This is the first time that I read those but based on the definition given the majority of us are experiencing such problems.

> The phenomenon where people tend to overestimate how much others notice aspects of one’s appearance or behavior - [Reducing Social Anxiety: The Spotlight Effect]( https://www.cabrini.edu/blog/2020-2021-blogs/reducing-social-anxiety-the-spotlight-effect) - [Ryan Calderaro](https://www.cabrini.edu/blog/authors/ryan-calderaro) 

A good example is taking pictures of ourselves in public or even filming for a vlog. We think about how people will react when they see us doing such in public. I find it awkward to take my own selfies but love to take photos of my wife and daughter and even post them on social media.

It is good to be aware of ourselves and our actions as we are careful about what others think, but don't you agree it hinders us from harnessing our full potential?

A good example is if you want to start a new project may it be a blog or even a vlog posted on the blockchain or maybe in your own social media account. But when the moment that you open your camera and start filming, you feel that people around stare at you and laugh at you since you are talking to yourself.


> I ALWAYS FEEL THIS WAY!

Each time that I will go outside and plan to take some pictures of the surrounding I feel people are also looking at me. Most of the shots that I took from my device are stolen shots btw.

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![viber_image_2023-03-24_07-25-51-432.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/AK54avQMt2mk1KxrU6X5Wkams49qK5LbVdzU54RVrAoaXHW1YM2gZ1BmydNSniH.jpg)

<center> A short resting spot before reaching our home.</center>

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![viber_image_2023-03-24_07-26-29-356.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/23x12vd2NoMxfSzNK5JBKJnqGPvvcGHDMPxHQccvTdYAzEYmz3zUA8dLpfof3iof2cNXo.jpg)

<center> Empty basketball ring outside </center>

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<center> ![viber_image_2023-03-24_07-38-00-722.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/EpGRF2ABXSg136Gkrb3nEHcoBG6YfZR1fyHtrj12G2A5cKAqNdXx8QQJSkctVtiPNYD.jpg) </center>


<center>![viber_image_2023-03-24_07-41-12-401.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/AJkSS5TGCcBp5YwXJs4MrVxFA7YQ58ESzm5jXzrEU89qHsT33rJmQ4Q2eN3DxaV.jpg)</center>

<center> Me trying to take a picture of the area but saw someone looking thus hit the shutter button immediately without properly focusing on the place </center>

------

Publicly, I can say that I cannot take some decent shots. When I bought a new mobile device I told myself that I will be bolder to take some images outside as it defeats the purpose of acquiring a new one.


Taking the context of images and videos we can also relate the concept of sharing our blogs in our own social media accounts.

> How many of you share your post in your own accounts? I rarely do it as like in 20 post I created I might have shared one in my personal account.

Why?

Because I am afraid of possible scrutiny from other people I do know of. The preconceived judgement is so strong and even my podcast I rarely share that too! 

> I am hoping to get more listeners but with that mindset I doubt it will be.

So what's my point here?

We trap ourselves in the concept of spotlight effect and miss out some opportunities that could have been given to us. 

Maybe you are the next amazing content creator out there but since you are shy you are not able to unleash your full potential. I love how one friend of my quote things in a harsh but truthful way *"The world will judge you no matter what you do, so do what makes you happy without trampling the feet of others"*

Also one mindset that I am trying to adapt is people don't care at all. They have their own lives to worry and they might glance for you in a bit but then forget what happened afterwards like a goldfish.

It is always easier said than done. Believe me I am still in the same situation and little by little improving to such.

> This is why I do podcast and webinars and other stuff for me to get used to the feeling.

So yeah if you are feeling such lately and even today I want you to remember that it is okay. Take things slowly and try to incorporate change in your life. 

You will see the changes as you go along the process. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Shameless plug! 

<center>
![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/23twAVeHoyakpsNwUnonDkjqjegacGnTk8KWnT6MZCaGvN2DyonjwbDnLCg3E4CWui7BK.png)</center>


<center>![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tpkidkai/23t8CfKPx33mQgVwjs6EjcMeUcAcNykZoYHmhQmUq61kKoM9dAv2A8Mp4PyV5Sk8UaiE7.png)</center>

<iframe style="border-radius:12px" src="https://open.spotify.com/embed/show/1rwBEJLlPhVE2TrIulRmoR?utm_source=generator" width="100%" height="352" frameBorder="0" allowfullscreen="" allow="autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; fullscreen; picture-in-picture" loading="lazy"></iframe>

Thank you friends for supporting the podcast that I am working with. It means a lot to me! Based on the location, I do know some of you and hopefully if I hit I will never forget you.

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@adamada · Mar 24 '23

I encountered the term spotlight effect when I was doing some readings on the common mindtraps. 

> It is good to be aware of ourselves and our actions as we are careful about what others think, but don't you agree it hinders us from harnessing our full potential?

If I paid attention too much about what others think, maybe I wouldn't be able to accomplish things that needed to be done. It's good to pay that attention but be selective to whom it came from because others don't necessarily have the intentions of looking out for you.

> Also one mindset that I am trying to adapt is people don't care at all. They have their own lives to worry and they might glance for you in a bit but then forget what happened afterwards like a goldfish.

This.

👍 tpkidkai

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voter	weight	wgt%	rshares	pct	time
tpkidkai	0 B		5,614,129,076	30%

@tpkidkai · Mar 24 '23

$0.12

> If I paid attention too much about what others think, maybe I wouldn't be able to accomplish things that needed to be done. It's good to pay that attention but be selective to whom it came from because others don't necessarily have the intentions of looking out for you.

I can agree with this beshy this is why I sort out some stuff lately na. Been away to focus on more stuff that can bring more value to me.

👍 adamada

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@adamada · Mar 25 '23

>  that can bring more value to me.

Open parin yung tiangge ko for loans~ bekenemen.

👍 tpkidkai

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1 reply

@amayphin · Mar 24 '23

Haha, thats why I like here on hive. I can share without thinking about others opinion, because there are few people here know me personally.

👍 tpkidkai

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@tpkidkai · Mar 24 '23

Sa true! HAHAH yung Hive friends lang madalas ang may alam sa mga ganitong ganap. Mas vulnerable dito kesa sa mga online friends sa Facebook. I am trying more to become both sa social circle ko pero ang hirap din eh haha.

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@callmesmile · Mar 24 '23

>Also one mindset that I am trying to adapt is people don't care at all. They have their own lives to worry and they might glance for you in a bit but then forget what happened afterwards like a goldfish.

**Mindset**

"People don't care but they **mind**, and are only **waiting to catch our mistake**". This was my fear, but/so **mindset matters** and I like yours. I think I should practice this one too and who knows, sooner or later I might discover more of myself by not fearing the unknown. 

Thanks for this another malaman blog TP.

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@tpkidkai · Mar 24 '23

> I think I should practice this one too and who knows, sooner or later I might discover more of myself by not fearing the unknown.

Indeed sometimes the fear is in our head - analysis paralysis din kaya nakaka amaze lang na we try stuff na di talaga tayo at ease at times eh.

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@chichi18 · Mar 24 '23

> "The world will judge you no matter what you do, so do what makes you happy without trampling the feet of others"

Absolutely @tpkidkai 

And yeah you can't please everyone so you better go do what you have to do and be happy then you judge yourself if that happiness was worth it but of course it will be, para unahan mo na yung mga judgies. LOL.

And sometimes it does not need to make sense to make sense. 😅

And !PIZZA

👍 tpkidkai

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@tpkidkai · Mar 24 '23

> And yeah you can't please everyone so you better go do what you have to do and be happy then you judge yourself if that happiness was worth it but of course it will be, para unahan mo na yung mga judgies. LOL.

PREACHH!!! 

> And sometimes it does not need to make sense to make sense. 😅

Ganun na nga wala silang pake basta tayo happy lang.

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@evernoticethat · Mar 25 '23 (edited)

>Also one mindset that I am trying to adapt is people don't care at all. They have their own lives to worry and they might glance for you in a bit but then forget what happened afterwards like a goldfish.

I wonder how much of a part culture and upbringing play a part in how we develop in this arena? When I studied in Europe, as an American, I was surprised at the reticence of the British students. They were very reserved, almost painfully so, that I made it my mission to get them to loosen up a bit.

I saw one English guy online explain that he would be too full of anxiey to return an unwanted item to a retail store as we do in the US. Here, I do it whenever an item doesn't meet expectations, and it's not looked upon in a bad way at all.

In Germany, a muslim man was surprised that I greeted both him, his wife, and their male and female kids equally. Here in the US, men and women are considered equals, while in his culture women are almost seen as disposable. To me, his male family members were considered no more important than his female ones, and if he didn't like it, he could go pound sand.

Thus culture (and the limitations it can place on us-if we allow it) has I think, a huge part to play in how we see ourselves and react to other people.

So the next time you're out there about to take a picture, ignore those people and get the shot that you want. Don't allow what you think about them to cause you to miss a moment that you may never see again. :)</div>

👍 whitneyalexx

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@tpkidkai · Mar 25 '23

> I wonder how much of a part culture and upbringing play a part in how we develop in this arena? When I studied in Europe, as an American, I was surprised at the reticence of the British students. They were very reserved, almost painfully so, that I made it my mission to get them to loosen up a bit. 

This is a great insight I never consider this idea until you brought it into daylight.  Yeah cultural norms would matter too! Filipino's tend to be more reserved and meek especially the ones who grew up in the rural area. We tend to see people oozing with confidence as a negative trait. 

> So the next time you're out there about to take a picture, ignore those people and get the shot that you want. Don't allow what you think about them to cause you to miss a moment that you may never see again. :)

Jeez I am trying my best on that! HAHA old habits don't die easily. 

![untitled.gif](https://media.tenor.com/SJB6qh5DpCsAAAAC/free-anime.gif)

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@jenthoughts · Mar 25 '23

Luhhh this is me. Nakakahiya talaga, need ko pa talaga kapalan Ang Mukha in terms of taking pictures in public. Kapag sa mga tourist spot na parang normal lang Ang picture taking di Ako nahihiya pero kapag sa mga places na parang walang nagtitake Ng pictures nahihiya talaga Ako.

Like halimbawa sa grocery store, gusto kung kumuha Ng pic pero parang nahihiya Ako, thinking na baka bawal. I have tried before pero patago hahaha..

Sa market and roads gustong gusto ko magtake Ng pic pero di ko pa talaga nagagawa. Natatalo parin Ako sa hiya hahahah

👍 tpkidkai

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@tpkidkai · Mar 25 '23

I can relate Jen! Diba! We have a ton of places and moments that we want to take pictures kaso andami tao sayang lang ang ops. Pang post nadin sa Hive eme. Sayang naman na bumili tayo ng bagong cellphone kung di rin lang naman magagamit.

👍 jenthoughts

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@jenthoughts · Mar 25 '23

Kapalan na natin mga Mukha natin to and take more pictures hahaha

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@pizzabot · Mar 26 '23

<center>PIZZA! 


PIZZA Holders sent <strong>$PIZZA</strong> tips in this post's comments:
@tpkidkai<sub>(1/5)</sub> tipped @whitneyalexx (x1)


<sub>Join us in <a href="https://discord.gg/hivepizza">Discord</a>!</sub></center>

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@whitneyalexx · Mar 26 '23

Never knew this feeling had a term “the spotlight effect”. I suffered a lot of loss because of this- loss of opportunities actually. I missed out on the freedom to be me. I've grown past that though and I have the various communities on hive to thank for this too. 
I see a cloud that looks awesome or a lovely picture moment and I phase out from the world not minding who is watching then take the picture. The highest reaction I've gotten from people around is... ‘Can I take your pictures for you?’ and ‘I’m taking your pictures too’ - I just smile sheepishly and move on.

Indeed, just seizing the moments, expressing yourself and being yourself is key. 

Thanks for the reminder🙏
Do have a splendid weekend.

👍 tpkidkai

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@tpkidkai · Mar 26 '23

I did have a splending weekend thank you for that !LUV

>  I suffered a lot of loss because of this- loss of opportunities actually. I missed out on the freedom to be me. I've grown past that though and I have the various communities on hive to thank for this too. 

The majority of us have this kinda sucks why it happen but it is a good way to protect ourselves too for future harm that we might experience ( well too much protection that makes us sticklike figures in terms of situation like these) 

Seize every opportunity! Easy to be said but try and try and try and try haha.

Hope that you are doing well too here's some !PIZZA

👍 whitneyalexx

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@luvshares · Mar 26 '23

@whitneyalexx, @tpkidkai<sub>(1/3)</sub> sent you LUV. | <a
    href="https://crrdlx.websavvy.work/" style="text-decoration:none">tools</a> | <a 
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    href="https://crrdlx.websavvy.work/wiki/doku.php?id=start" style="text-decoration:none">HiveWiki</a> | <a href="https://peakd.com/nftforpeace/@hivebuzz/nft-for-peace" target="_blank"><img src="https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/crrdlx/Epvkqd2sQEjZxu93x3A2J2fztKDarTY17qgMbpqWRV14NrfNBA6fu1jxtTkZztjXZKo.gif" target="_blank"><a href="https://peakd.com/nftforpeace/@hivebuzz/nft-for-peace" target="_blank">NFT</a> | <a href="https://ichthys.netlify.app" style="text-decoration:none"><>< daily</a>
<center>Made with <a href="https://peakd.com/@luvshares" target="_blank"><img src="https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/crrdlx/AKKSsM8HYHY5o4R1UPRdUADTz5QpsKAxSH5uyxsK4k1AJz5wsBqm7TfvA8aSCjE.png"></a> by <a href="https://hive.blog/@crrdlx" target="_blank">crrdlx</a></center>

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@whitneyalexx · Mar 26 '23

Will do well to seize every opportunity that comes my way. 

I'm doing well😁 Thank you loads🙏

properties (22)