Very apt. i really appreciate this post as i am fairly new here and to be candid i have asked myself this question, i am glad @uglyswater posted this. Thank you

There are a few unwritten rules here.  Because Steemit is decentralized at its core and there is no central authority making rules for conduct, it's up to the community to police itself, and over the last year or so some basic rules have come up.  They're mostly common sense, but some aren't as obvious.

1. **Reputation matters** - Generally speaking, courtesy is king here.  Sometimes you can't avoid a crappy conversation, but being an asshole isn't the best or preferable method.
2. **Don't upvote your own comments and posts** - This one is more of a subjective thing and isn't universally accepted, but, as you've noticed, some people take it seriously.  It's a toss-up.  I don't see the problem with it; it's your vote.  Same with randowhale and whaleshares.  It has a lot to do with the idea that, as curators, we're supposed to be finding *other people's* quality content to push, not our own.

Hey, just be yourself. 
Let go of any other intentions, 
and you will be free of tension.
Free yourself from opinions,
which are not yours.
Perhaps, others just clumsy enough
to run under your toes.
You know, it´s not always you!
Take care, be aware,
love yourself, be kind to others,
do your best,
we are all learning.
Don´t let someone manipulate you!
Hey, just try to be yourself.

Finding it interesting that the same people who are drawn to a decentralized and "free from governance" platform, once comfortable start making rules! Human nature I guess, order into chaos and chaos into order, maybe we just like the transition...

All that being said, I've only been active on Steemit for a little over a week, and I certainly don't want to screw up the ediquitte or do something that's unfair, or just plain rude without even knowing it.  Great post for minnows like me- Thank you!

***Number one most important rule:*** Don't be a dick for no reason on someone else's post.

(I.e. the randowhale comments.)

there ARE no rules.

Wow, you make a good point. Hmm, while I see both sides I'd love to see what everyone else thinks. Personally I don't see randowhale as a negative when it can be equally available to everyone.😟😖

The tricky thing is that there's no one answer what the right ethics are on steemit. Some people hate self-voting, others are ambivalent. Some people passionately rebuke comment spam, others say it's a good idea to upvote your comments as advertising.

In the end I think you have to look internally and do what feels right.

Good point

I'm certainly no more experienced, but so far this is what I've noticed, and the opinion I've formed.

Don't troll people. This is the simplest most obvious one. Shockingly, at least for now, it seems to be followed pretty well.

This platform offers the ability to earn a bit, and you have to realize some people are here to do so. Randowhale and self upvoting is part of certain people's purpose here, so while something similar could be frowned upon in other social networks, some understanding is needed here. 

Don't beg. Particularly in the comments, don't ask everyone to follow you. They'll follow and upvote if they like your post.

Don't make eye contact with a guy in a public washroom. This is more of a rule of the world than SteemIt, but I feel this point can't be stressed enough.

I've never heard about people complaining about @randowhale and I don't think using @randowhale to upvote your own posts is a bad thing either, you don't even get that much out of it anyway with it just voting with the VP of like up to 5%?
A lot of people vote for their own posts too and if you're a big steak holder that adds up a hefty amount of $ to the post.
Also, some people are just not nice or jealous.

You made a good point.  I look forward to hearing what people think too.

This post received a 1.6% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @gringalicious!  For more information, [click here](https://steemit.com/steemit/@randowhale/introducing-randowhale-will-you-get-the-100-vote-give-it-a-shot)!

The worst is not even that.

There is a much bigger problem, which are called "cleaners", which has enough power to make a post stay hidden.

What criteria do they use to remove a post? Recently they removed two posts from me just because they did not like the theme.

At this rate Steemit will become a "Fakebook" that pays to users ... but freedom will not exist

All communities tend to have both "laws" and "guidelines" and then "etiquette".

Laws tend to be enforceable and immutable. "No stealing."
Guidelines tend to be good ideas most embrace.  "Always use a photo in a post"
Etiquette is subjective and full of opinions "unsolicited Follow For Follow requests are impolite"

All have value to a community, but can cause great consternation among peoples of differing cultural backgrounds, value sets and "morals".

But I think it goes bottom up - a generally accepted "etiquette" like keep your comments contextual to a post, evolves to a solid Guideline accepted by all, and can eventually become "the law of the land" if it gets enough traction to become expected and demanded by the community at large.

I don't know if I'm adding value on this topic with these observations, but I am throwing them out there as my point of view on where "etiquette" is important and forms the basis for our happy steemit society, thus it's importance and your seeking answers to it in this post is a good conversation to be having!