与世界为敌 by coder-bts

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cn · @coder-bts · Oct 1 '18

$0.70

与世界为敌

## 序
---

这不是一件我能够控制的事情。与其说是一个选择，不如说是一种心病。

是一种长存于心底，压抑到不能再压抑的一种感觉，一颗种子。
在一个临界点，突然所有的情绪都在一瞬间完完全全的爆发了。

## 一
---

很突然的决定。我清楚的感觉到这不是一个好的决定，但是没有办法控制自己。

大概是我这一辈子做过最最消极，最会让我后悔的决定，但是我这次没有办法控制自己。

这一次我很难拿捏，这是否是我想通了，还是彻彻底底地想错了？

前一段时日，我对友情、亲情、爱情有了一个全新的定义，与自己以前的想法完全相悖的一个全新定义。

We are not friends, you are just one of my connections that statistically showing a significance.

这种思想仿佛是在完完全全地抹除自己身上的人性。

Human won't be human without humanity.

正是这样。

## 二
---

所有的 connections 都是不必要的，都是可以甩开的。

这个世界上没有真正的朋友，只有两个比较相像的个体。就像是强作用力下的两个原子，他们永远都不是朋友。

既然没有真正的朋友，那就抛开朋友这个定义吧，那就没有朋友吧，那就不关心时间一切的情感吧。

我在告诉自己，不，这是错的。
但是我的伤疤在告诉我，你必须这么做。

我找到了一个非常适合形容自己的词：Vulnerable

Hey, we were never friends.

要这样走向每一个人，带着嘲讽的语气说出这句话吗？

## 三
---

对立面。非友即敌。

在我的内心中，已经在我不知不觉的时候产生了这种观念，维度。

非友即敌，则人人是敌。

既然无法融入，那我能为一想到的存在的方法就是与所有人为敌。

与所有人为敌。

曾经爱过的人，喜欢的人，最好的朋友，伙伴，客户，所有的人。我感觉我下不了手，但是内心的压迫感让我无法不这么做。

看每一个人的视角都充满了敌意。

这可能是我内心的 Anarchism 疯狂扩张的结果。

## 四
---

可能还有一丝希望改变自己的状态吧。

可能。

谢谢。

👍 softmetal, freedomshift, team-cn, myreader, julian2013, ericet, lebin, justyy, cnbuddy, cn-malaysia, haiyangdeperci, auleo, minloulou, coder-bts, tydebbie, dailychina, dailystats, sweet-jenny8, jianan, zy-sb, busy.org, turtlegraphics, witnesstools, dongfengman, hardmetal, liewsc, superbing, ilovecoding, steemfuckeos, liuzg, honoru, xiaoyuanwmm, sunai, springfall, ethanlee, laiyuehta, pgr, anxin, shuxuan, lilypang22, happyukgo, fanso, woolfe19861008, serenazz, foodielifestyle, joelone, regals, steemitvip, zens, deepthinking, twinsnicole, zasilla, yedda, yuxuan, vincenthan, nean, daxiang, geass, kikima, kangnajiang, rainyapril, robinlee, nokeh

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@cnbuddy · Oct 1 '18

帅哥/美女！你好！家中可愛的寵物照想要跟大家分享嗎？或是出去玩拍到一些可愛的動物，別忘了到@dpet分享，可以得到@dpet的獎勵喔！如果不想再收到我的留言，请回复“取消”。

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@freedomshift · Oct 5 '18 (edited)

$0.03

I was just thinking about you, @coder-bts, and then you showed up as an upvote of my post.

It's good that you realized the strength or rather the weakness of friendship.

I am much older than you and have been through many job changes and moves.

And, guess what, friendships don't continue or last after you change jobs, change schools, or moved - both parties of this connection or relationship must put in more energy to maintain it but in reality, it will often take so much more effort - in my days past anyways.

In life, one's blessed or fortunate to have 5 good friends even when it's much later in life; I don't.

When life gets complicated, there will be more and more things that you cannot share with friends that you have moved away or they have moved not just the physical location, but the philosophy, mindset, and our outlook on life - the world economies and politics.

I have been aware of the many lies that are out there. I might not be 100% sure that I know the truth, but what I do know for sure separates me from not just some old friends but my family - perhaps until they are ready to look at the world differently.

I hope that helps. Please reach out to me if you think it might help - someone to talk to or sound off.

All the best!

👍 freedomshift, coder-bts

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@coder-bts · Oct 5 '18

Really appreciate it. 

I will be likely to write another blog about this soon. It is really grateful to hear someone older talking about his understanding.

I just mentioned you as the one of the most important person I met on steemit in a @team-cn interview and should be posted soon.

All the best.

Posted using [Partiko iOS](https://steemit.com/@partiko-ios)

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@freedomshift · Oct 5 '18

Your change in attitude and assessment of relationships is wise and healthy. However, the correct conclusion in the course of actions might surprise you - treating all connections as enemies rather than as friends means ...

> It's not too often that Sun Tzu, the brilliant Chinese military strategist and Al Pacino of “The Godfather” give the same wise business advice: Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. In other words, follow not only what your business partners are doing, but what your competitors are involved in as well. Dec 27, 2012
Keeping Your Enemies Closer - Forbes
https://www.forbes.com/sites/aileron/2012/12/27/keeping-your-enemies-closer/

> Who said, 'Keep your friends close and your enemies closer?' - Quora
https://www.quora.com/Who-said-Keep-your-friends-close-and-your-enemies-closer
Nov 4, 2014 - This has frequently been ascribed to Sun Tzu and once in a while to Niccolò Machiavelli or Petrarch, yet there are no distributed sources saying which was its origin before its utilization by "Michael Corleone" in The Godfather Part II (1974), composed by Mario Puzo and Francis Ford Coppola: "My dad taught me numerous ...

A more guarded approach than the more open attitude when you were younger is wise and recommended - don't open up so quickly or easily to new connections. Friendships and all connections must be tested - time and situation-tested ([只有遇到困难才能看到真正的友谊
](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1CAASUF_enUS762US762&ei=FNa3W6-uOdHAsAWum42YCw&q=%E5%8F%AA%E6%9C%89%E9%81%87%E5%88%B0%E5%9B%B0%E9%9A%BE%E6%89%8D%E8%83%BD%E7%9C%8B%E5%88%B0%E7%9C%9F%E6%AD%A3%E7%9A%84%E5%8F%8B%E8%B0%8A&oq=%E5%8F%AA%E6%9C%89%E9%81%87%E5%88%B0%E5%9B%B0%E9%9A%BE%E6%89%8D%E8%83%BD%E7%9C%8B%E5%88%B0%E7%9C%9F%E6%AD%A3%E7%9A%84%E5%8F%8B%E8%B0%8A&gs_l=psy-ab.3...510818.510818..512715...0.0..0.158.158.0j1......0....1j2..gws-wiz.......0i71.UP3gkkZAPfA)).

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1 reply

@julian2013 · Oct 2 '18

哈哈，年轻人想法多

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@shine.wong · Oct 10 '18

抛弃非友即敌的想法，接受中立的人群，不轻易把中立人群视为友，这样能很好的保护自己~就像除了黑白还有灰一样~
曾经的我也有你这样的想法，之后我开始允许一丝丝的灰色存在，多年后的今天，灰色已经成了很宽的一部分，另外两个在两端反而少了很多~就像一个正方形，两端的黑白和当中的灰，各种比例的调整增减。
或许今天的我是我当初很不屑成为的，但是自己和自己较劲真的很累……更何况保持那样的想法是和社会较劲，最后选择让自己过的舒服才是对自己好！

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@softmetal · Oct 1 '18

你又怎么了？

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@coder-bts · Oct 1 '18

idk

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@softmetal · Oct 1 '18

天才就是容易想太多啊

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@steemitboard · Oct 24 '18

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**Do not miss the last post from @steemitboard:**
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> Support [SteemitBoard's project](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)! **[Vote for its witness](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1)** and **get one more award**!

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@zy-sb · Oct 2 '18

情深不寿
慧极必伤
压力太大了去运动一下或外出散散心

Posted using [Partiko Android](https://steemit.com/@partiko-android)

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