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Hard to get friends when you are shy, but it is good doing new ones. by gwajnberg

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· @gwajnberg ·
$4.68
Hard to get friends when you are shy, but it is good doing new ones.
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<p>&emsp; How many friends entered in our lives? How many friends left our lives? I don't know how to count and gather these numbers for stats purposes, so bad that there isn't any SQL tool to do that in our brain. Well living a bit about the nerd jokes, yes I am a nerd, a geek probably. That means that during my childhood I had a bit of different tastes compared to friends. Different from many kids/teenagers I always loved things that weren't too much trending. I never enjoyed dressing in clothes and listening to music when everybody was on board. So how did I make friends anyway? </p>
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<p>&emsp; Quantos amigos entraram em nossas vidas? Quantos amigos deixaram nossas vidas? Eu não sei como contar e reunir esses números para fins estatísticos, é uma pena que não haja nenhuma ferramenta SQL para fazer isso em nosso cérebro. Bem, falando um pouco sobre piadas de nerd, sim, eu sou um nerd, provavelmente um geek. Isso significa que durante minha infância eu tinha gostos um pouco diferentes em comparação com meus amigos. Diferente de muitas crianças/adolescentes, eu sempre amei coisas que não estavam muito em alta. Nunca gostei de me vestir com roupas e ouvir música quando todo mundo estava a bordo. Então, como fiz amigos mesmo assim?</p>
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![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/gwajnberg/23zGijJDdqCn1Yc5tUeQmKQiBEPkFw2qR3gFirKooTpqjzLFefmhzNww6Gy6MhJod6JqT.png)
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<div class="text-center"><sub><a href="https://pixabay.com/illustrations/woman-hiding-gesture-shy-girl-6093238/">As a shy person I had always some problems in socializing especially when they are kids..</a></sub> </div>
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<p>&emsp; Despite being a kid more focused on learning, mostly science since younghood, watching many documentaries from National Geographics, I still had some common things with the majority of kids, like discussing and playing football (soccer around here in North America) and playing video games.  Still, that didn't add me to the list of popular kids in the school, since playing football is just a temporary social event. After the end of a game, kids go back and start talking to some other stuff. And since my interests were a bit not too popular, I ended up forming a group with the "weirdos" of the class. But still, I didn't get too attached to these kids, since after school I barely saw them. Living in a big city like Rio de Janeiro makes things difficult, I used to live very far from these kids and that created some barriers to feed these friendships. However, I used to live in an apartment building and I had a friend there, a very true friend that  I used to spend most of my time with him. I had two other 2 or 3 friends when I was younger, but they grew and decided to go more to discos, like afternoon sessions for teenagers, I hated the type of music so I never went there. The only person who didn't like also the type of pop music from the 90's, was this friend. I mentioned him before in my posts since he was the only friend that I missed from Brazil, we got stuck together for many years even after both of us found our partners. We liked technology and rock music, so we used to go to rock concerts and hang out, watching movies, etc.  He is also very shy like me and I think that's why we matched a bit. In our apartment where we used to live, there was a season during the summer holidays with no school when everyone used to travel there, so it was what I called boring days since we didn't have enough people to play football, and only this friend used to get stuck with me there. My parents hated to travel, since my father used to travel a lot for his work, so during holidays he preferred to hang around home but also rest and watch TV, so also no activities for me and my brother. At least I could hang with this friend since his parents also didn't like to travel much. I had also during my teens what I call temporary friends. Friends that have similar tastes like you but after some decisions in life we take different paths and never see them again. So even being shy we get some friends in our path, but true friends are rare. A friend that sticks around for a long time and you can also talk about some topics that you consider important, like more personal things.  </p>
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<p>&emsp; Apesar de ser uma criança mais focada em aprender, principalmente ciências desde pequeno, assistindo muitos documentários da National Geographic, ainda tinha algumas coisas em comum com a maioria das crianças, como discutir e jogar futebol (soccer aqui na América do Norte) e jogar videogames. Ainda assim, isso não me colocou na lista das crianças populares na escola, já que jogar futebol é apenas um evento social temporário. Depois do fim de um jogo, as crianças voltam e começam a falar sobre outras coisas. E como meus interesses não eram muito populares, acabei formando um grupo com os "esquisitos" da classe. Mas ainda assim, não me apeguei muito a essas crianças, já que depois da escola eu mal as via. Morar em uma cidade grande como o Rio de Janeiro torna as coisas difíceis, eu costumava morar muito longe dessas crianças e isso criava algumas barreiras para alimentar essas amizades. No entanto, eu costumava morar em um prédio de apartamentos e tinha um amigo lá, um amigo muito verdadeiro com quem eu costumava passar a maior parte do meu tempo. Eu tinha mais dois ou três amigos quando era mais jovem, mas eles cresceram e decidiram ir mais para discotecas, como sessões da tarde para adolescentes, eu odiava o tipo de música então nunca fui lá. A única pessoa que também não gostava do tipo de música pop dos anos 90, era esse amigo. Eu o mencionei antes em meus posts, já que ele era o único amigo que eu sentia falta do Brasil, nós ficamos juntos por muitos anos, mesmo depois de ambos encontrarmos nossos parceiros. Nós gostávamos de tecnologia e música rock, então costumávamos ir a shows de rock e sair, assistir filmes, etc. Ele também é muito tímido como eu e acho que é por isso que nos demos bem. No nosso apartamento onde costumávamos morar, havia uma temporada durante as férias de verão sem escola quando todo mundo costumava viajar, então era o que eu chamava de dias chatos, já que não tínhamos pessoas suficientes para jogar futebol, e apenas esse amigo costumava ficar comigo lá. Meus pais odiavam viajar, já que meu pai costumava viajar muito por causa do trabalho, então durante as férias ele preferia ficar em casa, mas também descansar e assistir TV, então também não havia atividades para mim e meu irmão. Pelo menos eu podia sair com esse amigo, já que os pais dele também não gostavam muito de viajar. Eu também tive durante minha adolescência o que chamo de amigos temporários. Amigos que têm gostos semelhantes aos seus, mas depois de algumas decisões na vida, seguimos caminhos diferentes e nunca mais os vemos. Então, mesmo sendo tímidos, fazemos alguns amigos em nosso caminho, mas os verdadeiros amigos são raros. Um amigo que fica por perto por muito tempo e com quem você também pode conversar sobre alguns assuntos que considera importantes, como coisas mais pessoais.</p>
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<div class="text-center"><sub><a href="https://pixabay.com/vectors/men-friends-coffee-coffeeshop-7835596/">Drinking with friends is something that I have always enjoyed doing, it is an opportunity to forget a bit about the problems.</a></sub> </div>
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<p>&emsp; I don't know what I prefer, but because of my characteristics of being shy, or introverted people sometimes think that I am not cool, or even I am a guy that doesn't like making friends. I like to make friends, but also I don't have many of the skills to talk much, well as an adult I improved a lot. But still, I prefer getting closer to people who have similar tastes to me. But still is difficult to get some deep friendships. Right now I only have one big friend, my wife, the only person I talk to about all the topics that I find interesting, but I know that some of these topics aren't much of her taste, such as crypto for example. I have this other friend still that I talk to about these things, however, he is far away. We still try to talk about these things by WhatsApp, but it is so hard. I think I need a friend near me to whom I can go to take some beers and talk about anything, I have tried also, but the problem is that I have two small kids at home, and the time that I have for a friend right now needs to be compatible with my empty time slots. So, it is very difficult to get friends near me at this point in life, despite I am a more social adult compared to me as a kid, my time is so busy. I hope that shortly I can have more time to meet new friends, with similar tastes. I am a cool guy, but I am shy and busy. </p>
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<p>&emsp; Eu não sei o que prefiro, mas por causa das minhas características de ser tímido, ou de ser uma pessoa introvertida, às vezes as pessoas pensam que eu não sou legal, ou até mesmo que sou um cara que não gosta de fazer amigos. Eu gosto de fazer amigos, mas também não tenho muitas habilidades para falar muito, bem, como adulto, melhorei bastante. Mas ainda assim, prefiro me aproximar de pessoas que têm gostos semelhantes aos meus. Mas ainda é difícil criar amizades profundas. No momento, tenho apenas um grande amigo, minha esposa, a única pessoa com quem converso sobre todos os assuntos que acho interessantes, mas sei que alguns desses assuntos não são muito do gosto dela, como criptomoedas, por exemplo. Tenho esse outro amigo com quem converso sobre essas coisas, no entanto, ele está longe. Ainda tentamos falar sobre essas coisas pelo WhatsApp, mas é tão difícil. Acho que preciso de um amigo por perto com quem possa sair para tomar algumas cervejas e conversar sobre qualquer coisa, também tenho tentado, mas o problema é que tenho dois filhos pequenos em casa, e o tempo que tenho para um amigo agora precisa ser compatível com meus horários vagos. Portanto, é muito difícil conseguir amigos perto de mim neste momento da vida, apesar de ser um adulto mais social em comparação comigo quando era criança, meu tempo é tão ocupado. Espero que em breve eu possa ter mais tempo para conhecer novos amigos, com gostos semelhantes. Eu sou um cara legal, mas sou tímido e ocupado.</p>
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@ayamihaya ·
$0.03
I am also a shy person and my true friends can handle me in those situations and they don’t even bother me about it I am glad I have found them.
👍  
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@gwajnberg ·
Always nice to see you around in my post :) 
I saw that you have a bit more than me hehehe. True friends are important not to force us doing anything that we don't want to do! hehe
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@ayamihaya ·
I was supposed to be here with you everyday, but I got very busy as you can see I didn't even post for a long time and too many gaps. I am free again I hope we will get along again.

!PIZZA
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@dhedge ·
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@nwothini335 ·
$0.03
It is very important to go close.to people who share the same mindset and taste with you. This will make it easier for both you and them and there will be understanding between you
👍  
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@gwajnberg ·
Yes i think by nature we do that.. few people can go close to people with different mindset but those people are the fakest ones!
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@nwothini335 ·
True. 

We just have to be ourselves ad wait for true friends 
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@perfilbrasil ·
Obrigado por postar
Obrigado por promover a comunidade Hive-BR em suas postagens.

Vamos seguir fortalecendo a Hive

<div class='text-right'><sup>Metade das recompensas dessa resposta serão destinadas ao autor do post.</sup></div><hr/><h4><center><a href='https://vote.hive.uno/@perfilbrasil'>Vote no @perfilbrasil para Testemunha Hive.</a></center></h4>
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@pizzabot ·
<center>PIZZA!


$PIZZA slices delivered:
@ayamihaya<sub>(1/5)</sub> tipped @gwajnberg 


</center>
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@selfhelp4trolls ·
$0.03
I grew up similar to you, but kept many of my interests secret because I did not want to be bothered by people’s criticism. Rock music and video games at different times, also meeting people with different stories on the internet. 

I used to be pretty awkward and shy as a kid.  Sometimes I feel introversion and extroversion is more about environment and habits than some intrinsic trait. If people around us are judgmental or don’t give us space to have our own rhythm, it’s natural to become introverted, and if people have rhythms that can blend with ours, it might be easier to become extroverted. 

Sadly most environments don’t give people the space and encouragement they need and are very judgmental. Luckily I found a few communities that helped me get over my awkwardness.  Now I like my alone time just so I can focus on my projects but I have no issues in social situations when people aren’t pushing me to conform to their rhythm. 

Anyway,if you like yourself, that’s the most important thing 
👍  
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vote details (1)
@gwajnberg ·
$0.04
>Anyway,if you like yourself, that’s the most important thing

I think that usually happens with time... I remember in school that was the big problem, I hated myself. All the environment that was built in there was so toxic for me. Luckily that changed, University was a big step toward a better understanding of who was and yeah we can be different and happy at the same time.  Started to get more confident about myself, with baby steps and now I think that I am in a good position. I didn't achieve the desirable position at work that I dreamed of 10 years ago, but I am happy. And I think that Hive brought me a good opportunity around, I can write about myself and find people like you around and I feel happy to see that I am not an alien hehe. Thanks for your answer! 
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@shiftrox ·
$0.03
Eu sempre me senti excluído também por ser mais pra frente das coisas, ser inteligente ou gostar de animes e computador, as pessoas parecem que se afastavam de mim por conta disso e eu ficava pensando, caramba é ruim ser inteligente então e gostar destas maluquices tecnológicas e tal, enfim, a hive caiu como uma luva pra mim, agora que tem muita gente que gosta exatamente do que gosto também!

!DHEDGE !BBH !LOLZ
👍  
properties (23)
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vote details (1)
@bbhbot ·
<center><p>@gwajnberg! <b>Your Content Is Awesome</b> so I just sent 1 <b>$BBH</b> (Bitcoin Backed Hive) to your account on behalf of @shiftrox. <sub>(7/20)</sub></p>
<p><img src="https://i.imgur.com/QwsegY0.png"></p></center>
properties (22)
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@gwajnberg ·
Eh isso ae!! Nem falava de anime na escola rsss ficava mais com o povo do mirc kkkk
properties (22)
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@shiftrox ·
kkkkkkkkkk entendi
properties (22)
authorshiftrox
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@lolzbot ·
<div class='pull-right'><center><img src="https://lolztoken.com/lolz.png"><br><a href="https://lolztoken.com">lolztoken.com</a></p><br><br><br><br></center></div><p><center><strong>What do you call a row of people lifting a giant mozzarella?<br>A cheesy pickup line.</strong><br><sub>Credit: <a href="https://peakd.com/@reddit">reddit</a></sub><br>@gwajnberg, I sent you an <a href="https://lolztoken.com">$LOLZ</a> on behalf of shiftrox<br><br>(9/10)<br>Delegate Hive Tokens to Farm $LOLZ and earn 110% Rewards.  <a href='https://peakd.com/@lolztoken/introducing-lolz-defi-now-you'>Learn more.</a></center></p>
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