Boom - "Comedy Open Mic Round # 28, I suppose [put the number of each round here]" in the title. by hyperbole

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humor · @hyperbole · Aug 29 '18 (edited)

$1.94

Boom - "Comedy Open Mic Round # 28, I suppose [put the number of each round here]" in the title.

https://pixabay.com/get/e831b60628fd1c22d2524518a33219c8b66ae3d01ab4154995f7c779/explosion-147909_1280.png
Finally, the ground stopped shaking, finally, the explosion seemed to be over.

I looked over the what remained of the little village I'd spent the last 3 days in and smirked. Nice job, if I did say so myself. And I did. It was a pity I'd had to destroy it, but sometimes the situation required such things.

Why, oh why, did he have to insult my mother? It had been going well before that, I had been preparing to leave, but then - _bam._ Out of nowhere. Well, there may have been a few choice words I'd said about his, but really, what are such comments between friends?

And then he'd gone and insulted mine. And then of course I'd had to react. Not that I'd ever known my mother, and even if I had I probably would have hated her. Therefore? I still had to defend her honor, and of course my own. So of course...
# BOOM!
#

There it went. It had been a nice explosion, as these things went - something to be truly proud of. Well, I suppose it was high time for the next town, the next tragedy. It was rea-

"Daisy! Earth to Daisy!"

I turned to look at John.

"Don't call me that! I told you to call me Crigen, devourer of souls and destro-"

He interrupted me with a snort. "Yeah, nice try. Not gonna happen. Now come, Mom and Dad are waiting."

I glared at his retreating back. Sometimes my brother was just so... _frustrating._ I might have to start experimenting with that chemistry kit I'd gotten earlier.
https://pixabay.com/get/e830b4082efd1c22d2524518a33219c8b66ae3d01ab4154995f7c17c/test-tubes-155769_1280.png

Random Words under post: All pictures from pixabay. I think I'll nominate @meesterboom and ~~@therealpaul~~ Sorry, didn't realize you'd already done it. I suppose I'll nominate @prospiracy instead. These out to be interesting...

👍 tombstone, kevinwong, comedyopenmic, therealpaul, meesterboom, kiwibot, buddyup, b00m, holybranches, sbi7, belemo, zhangyong, penderis, idikuci, bitfiend, whack.science, rentmoney, arconite, wisbeech, citizensmith, pretty.dorky, beturrio, nurhayati, spamfarmer, calumam, gordon92, trumpman2, prepperbot, hackerzizon, mrwang, bulent1976

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trumpman2	123,321,843	1.81%
comedyopenmic	214,652,538,656	12.1%
spamfarmer	222,025,055	12%
buddyup	18,419,930,409	50%
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sbi7	9,040,255,905	8%

@belemo · Aug 28 '18

Its not too late for that explosion, fart on his face

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@penderis · Aug 29 '18

...or do you mean shard. All explosions should have shrapnel.

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@hyperbole · Aug 29 '18

Now where could you be going with that?

Some questions are better left unasked. Or in this case, unanswered.

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@com-judge · Aug 28 '18

$2.69

Hi hyperbole, 
 
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)

#### Judges:
- @take5
- @raj808
- @anouk.nox
 
If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: [Click Here](https://discord.gg/rddw2Ny)
 
<center>[Click To Vote](https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=comedyopenmic&approve=1) @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!<a href="https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=comedyopenmic&approve=1">
<img src="https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/448711994275659777/454625592675926026/image.jpg" alt="Support COM Banner" style="width:42px;height:42px;border:0;">
</a>
<sub>Thank you to @matytan for the great banner </sub></center>

👍 comedyopenmic, idikuci

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@hyperbole · Aug 29 '18 (edited)

Oh, definitely pantsless with beer in hand. That's my favorite.

Or I'll pull a ~~Daisy~~ Crigen and take out my chemistry kit...

Oh yeah, and I love adopting positions. Though the standing position tends to make trouble in his teenage years.

👍 com-judge

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@meesterboom · Aug 28 '18

HAhhaha! I do believe @therealpaul has trodden that road before :OD

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@hyperbole · Aug 28 '18

oops.
might have to fix that, then.

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@penderis · Aug 29 '18

The world is her oyster, can either solve many world issues , cure cancer or she can bring down destruction on the next guy that breaks her heart in a very creative way which no one will understand but will give America an excuse to rally the troops and whatever it is those other wannabe countries do about fake as threats.

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@steemitboard · Aug 28 '18

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