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RE: error by yokunjon

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Viewing a response to: @duski.harahap/create-base-pwa-app-4-how-implementation-cache-in-api-handle-api-request-in-pwa-and-store-data-from-api-to-cache-1538610865327

· @yokunjon · (edited)
$7.45
I thank you for your contribution. Here are my thoughts;

* Titles show what your post is about, so use them wisely. When defining titles, choosing and positioning words is essential to gain the user's attention. Giving general words priority than the rest is the key to achieve that. So, consider putting "Jquery" or "Javascript"  ahead of the title.

* Your sentences are artifical. This makes them hard to read and understand. To overcome that, you should check the structure of your sentences. For example, using "we" for each sentence in the post makes it boring to read. Here is an example sentence:

  * "We can see the picture above, we managed to save the data we get from the fire into a cache that we can use when our application is offline"

  * "As you can see in the picture above, the program managed to save the data which is gotten from the cache that can be used when the application is offline."

  Instead of the one above, you can use the below one. It's not perfect nor mirror what you wrote, but it should be enough to make what I'm saying understood easily.

* There are some sentences which are hard to understand because of the vocabulary and grammar. I suggest you proofread your posts before posting. It can increase the efficiency of your post.

* Your post contains a large number of complex sentences. They are understandable, but addressing them will both increase your language ability and the efficiency of the post. Here is an example sentence:

  *  "We can see the picture above, we managed to save the data we get from the fire into a cache that we can use when our application is offline, there are still many cache strategies that you can apply to your Pwa application, the example I gave is one strategy and the method that I use, it all depends on the needs of the application that we build, hopefully this tutorial helps you to utilize the cache. thank you." 

  As you can see, there are multiple sentences in one sentence, separated with commas. Some languages like Turkish support this kind of sentence-crafting and it is quite easy to understand that. But in English, it can result in complex sentences.

  You can check this link to address your issue: http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/sentences/compound-sentences.html


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@duski.harahap ·
thanks @yokunjon for this critical feedback, indeed the problem of word selection is still my focus. I will increase this in the next tutorial, thank you
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@utopian-io ·
Thank you for your review, @yokunjon!

So far this week you've reviewed 3 contributions. Keep up the good work!
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