*If anything, this is one of those, "This is the hardest post I'll ever have to write," posts.*

*And not because I have some terrible news I'd like to utilize in my favor.*

*And by that I mean I didn't come here to set the victim card trap in order collect sympathy, for profit.*

*And sure, that kind of thing really pisses me off when I see others do it, but this post isn't about that; nor am I angry about anything, for now.*

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# This Is Hard

**It's hard because I haven't written anything in months.**

Some might throw that classic, "It's like riding a bike," idiom around but to them I say, ***"Have you ever actually ridden a goddamn bike before?"***

I think some people who say that shit don't know the first thing about riding bikes.&nbsp;  **Why do I not see the scars?&nbsp;  There's no mention of the truck about to come around the corner pretending to be a paint brush so it can smear you all over the pavement.&nbsp;  Why?**

*If you've truly ridden a bike before...*

## *Show me the receipts!*

You should have medical bills and lawyer fees coming out the ying-yang and going in all directions!&nbsp;  So show me those; *then we'll talk.*

If writing's like riding a bike and riding a bike is a tough skill to learn but easy forever after, *why have I completely ruined this post writing nonsense after spending years writing well and sometimes making sense?*

**Am I supposed to believe I'm some kind of a _Statistical Anomaly?_**

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### Of course not.

**Anyway.**&nbsp;  It's been another long enough while since we saw each other last.&nbsp;  Looking back into my history books here, it appears as if I took early Christmas vacation then extended it to last the rest of the winter because, *why not?*

It's always a mystery with me, *hey?*&nbsp;  And when people leave to go do their own thing for awhile without saying anything, the folks left behind often think something *negative* must have been the main contributing factor.&nbsp;  *Maybe something happened.&nbsp;  Maybe dude was stressed.&nbsp;  Maybe dude hates life and gives up too easy.&nbsp;  Maybe dude doesn't like us anymore.&nbsp; Maybe dude hit the bottle again and spent winter in prison because to be honest, he does come across as a bit of nutcase at times so I can see that happening to someone like him.&nbsp;  Maybe someone died.&nbsp; Maybe he's dead.&nbsp;  Maybe he killed someone.&nbsp;  Maybe etcetera.*

**You're fine.**

I trust myself enough to know I'll always be fine.&nbsp;  Nothing needs to be perfect and problems are solvable.&nbsp;  When I'm tired, I rest.&nbsp;  When I need space, I take some.&nbsp;  When I don't feel like doing something, I don't do it.  

Years ago when I started *this,* I had no idea where it would take me.&nbsp;  Safe to say I went pretty far, made quite a few good impressions, and left a lasting impact.&nbsp;  *So what's next?*

### I don't know.

I enjoy a good challenge and the biggest challenge I face these days — at least in *this world* — is regaining and retaining interest.

In order to appease the tribal types among us I will make it clear I've not lost interest in seeing this massive project known as Hive become the success it should be.&nbsp;  That hasn't changed.  

**Writing, art, being an attention whore, entertaining the masses with goals of breaking free from the shackles of being a virtual nobody forever.**&nbsp;  *Fizzle.&nbsp;  Fizzle.&nbsp;  Fizzle.*

### *Pop!*

Something a lot of contributors to this platform have in common is the fact they feel the pace of progress is too slow.&nbsp;  I can relate.&nbsp;  I've watched everything unfold.&nbsp;  Been around since damn near the beginning.&nbsp;  *I saw it all.&nbsp;  Almost five years, and that's a long time.*

The ball was rolling the entire time but I can't really say it was moving forward; until about around the time everyone threw up their middle fingers and rebranded the place into, *this.*

And *this* ain't so bad now.&nbsp;  I can be creative but nowhere in my imagination can I come up with excuses that deflect the reasons why I don't feel like producing content much anymore onto the platform, progress, or people involved.&nbsp;  **You folks are doing great so keep up the good work.**

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## It's not you.
**It's me.**

Can't even pretend to know when I'll be able to bounce back.&nbsp;  I miss making people laugh, the most.&nbsp;  Inside my mind is a lot of chatter.&nbsp;  Sometimes counterproductive internal dialogue interferes, then takes over.&nbsp;  Haunting thoughts have always been a part of who I am though.&nbsp;  Fighting those demons kept me in shape.&nbsp;  The only reason I'm alive is because I keep winning.

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**Troubled.**&nbsp;  People sense that in others.&nbsp;  They want to help; they want to lend an ear.&nbsp;  So much can be said on the inside but when it comes time to bring it outside, there are no words.&nbsp;  It's not something that can be put into words.&nbsp;  Consciousness extends beyond the simplicity of sharing ideas.&nbsp;  Putting it out there would be like describing red to the blind.

Spent a lot of time writing, creating, entertaining.&nbsp;  Enjoyed it; loved it.&nbsp;  Some of the best years of my life.&nbsp;  Turned a dream into a reality.&nbsp;  Proved a lot of naysayers wrong (which is always fun).&nbsp;  All that and probably only reached about ten percent of my true potential.&nbsp;  That's fucking amazing when you think about it.&nbsp;  I even got to feel what it's like to be wealthy, for a time.&nbsp;  It was all so nice and I will do it twice but I'm not scheduled to start the race again for awhile.

My experience here has given me a lot of good memories.&nbsp;  When you have a mind that isn't always your friend, *a good memory goes a long way,* ***so I HODL.***

I guess I don't really have much more to say right now other than this lazy ending.&nbsp;  I'll be around browsing content, for the foreseeable future anyway.&nbsp;  So I guess I'll see you all out and about, if you're still around.

# <center>*Have a nice day.*</center>

<center>![](http://i.imgur.com/RhgHUmy.jpg)</center><center>**Credits:**</center><center>**All art and images seen here were produced digitally, by me.**</center>  <center>![NoNamesLeftToUse Outro.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRVnycGuKWTrnHcWomQddWka2MR2Z6AXP4GYry1tG3X4E/NoNamesLeftToUse%20Outro.png)</center>
<center><sub>***"What in the actual fuck is the point of this sentence!"***</sub></center> 

<center><sup>**© 2021 @NoNamesLeftToUse.&nbsp; All rights reserved.**</sup></center>