It is the human nature to feel something the way we observe it, like going to a new place makes us excited until we form ourselves with the environment and surroundings of that place. But, for some people going to new places becomes a stressful experience, they feel anxiety because they could not form themselves with the adaption process. Being honest about our feeling matters a lot regardless of the situation.

The life needs choices to be made, right or wrong it does depend on the outcome, but once we direct our life to fulfill something a goal or target, we feel a bit of success within, it drives us to move on and set more new goals and get more successful in the process of living.

Well, of course I wish to be better.  Don't I?

At some point I think I dig too deeply into the morass that is me.  It's a fine line for me, that introspection line.  I need to know, I need to assess, I need to change-but some times I think I pry the lid off just because I think I should.

In all honesty, I am essentially a happy (content) person.  I really do love my life and try to live it to the best of my ability.  Could I be better at some things?  Yes, of course I could.  Could I be worse?  Well, yeah, I have been.  Much worse.  Do I ever find the balance?  No.  All I can hope for is close enough for contentment.

My weight.  I'm about 12 kilos from where I feel I ought to be, but the trend line is down so I don't get too fussed up with the ANGLE of the line.  I mostly make good choices in my eating and when I don't I don't just castigate myself, I just go back to making good choices.  Because I'm going to fail every now and again...

Aside:  I've thought of you the last 10 days-my water heater failed and it took the 10 days to get it back.  Much of that is the "I live in an old less than admirably maintained place and every time I touch something it needs to be replaced" syndrome.  But I am now approaching 48 hours of continuous hot water service, I have all new fixtures and supply plumbing and I can flush my toilet without removing the back and pulling the chain manually.  That was a coincidental breakdown, not related to the water heater in any way.  There is still work to do, and things that must be fixed-but not today.  I might even go to the store and get some ice cream-or not :)

they is alot of good place to reflect on things especially life Itself,i do go to friend house and stadium.

No way you have a young child? I've never seen her. 

What's up man? The above sentence is as true as this next one. I have no idea what you mean by changing cities in search of a parking spot falling more and more out of reality and further into depression. *I might've adlibbed slightly.*

<hr>

For years the only thing I've had consistent for myself is the gym. I'm grateful for it and it's rewarding to appreciate the mirror but even that, the past couple years, is becoming increasingly challenging. It regularly takes everything I got to talk myself out of cutting my reps short or sliding out early.

I didn't relate to anything you said in case you can't tell.

This sentence is fuckin with me but something about the longer I do this the more my conversations are virtual and then I realize I'm being vulnerable with a monitor when all I want is to be somewhere I don't want to leave.

>Have you ever noticed that the more we consume, the unhappier we get?

Is this an original idea?  I found this so true just thinking about it on the surface

I learned a long time ago to appreciate each day, if it was a bad day / or a great day, it’s still a gift. I know many people who have suffered tragic loss, death of their child or spouse, a nephew born just 2 months ago who is severely brain damaged. A sister and a brother who had accidents young that put them in wheelchairs for life. I could go on but don’t want to depress you, but I focus on how fortunate I have been in my lifetime. On this day I happily cut my lawn and smiled a the sun and was content to know all my children and grandchildren are well and thriving.
Attitude is everything.

How do you feel about Finland joining NATO, just wondering. Thanks 

5 years this has been happening to me, it started here, around people that are still here. Homeland security has done nothing at all, they are not here to protect us. Dont we pay them to stop shit like this? The NSA, CIA, FBI, Police and our Government has done nothing. Just like they did with the Havana Syndrome, nothing. Patriot Act my ass. The American government is completely incompetent. The NSA should be taken over by the military and contained Immediately for investigation. I bet we can get to the sources of V2K and RNM then. https://peakd.com/gangstalking/@acousticpulses/electronic-terrorism-and-gaslighting--if-you-downvote-this-post-you-are-part-of-the-problem

Dear @tarazkp , From my point of view, Finns(=@tarazkp?) seem to be engulfed in worry, anxiety and fear because of the Russian threat!

I don't think the US, Britain, France and Germany will go to war with Russia to defend Finland.

Oh god! i feel you so bad, every letter. Sometimes i can't control my mind and keep repeating the same things over and over.

> as it is easy to slip a little further into disconnection and depression

Look, I don't know, I don't know how to explain it but sometimes I'm not in the places where my body is, like being with a bunch of people and they could be talking and I'm not there, I'm not paying attention to what they say, nor to the surroundings, and sometimes silly thoughts creep into my head. And I feel like I've been conditioned to be like this because of the things that I do, for example, my job, my life in general, the fear of taking a real step to change.

> There is this cultural movement to "love yourself the way you are" 

I feel you there, because our minds are weak we are easy to manipulate, but in this case for me it is the opposite *because I love myself* it is that I assist the orthodontist to change the current shape of my crooked teeth or *because I love myself* I am going to cut my hair or paint it, if I want to exercise to lose weight it is because I love myself, it is good to love yourself as you are, but wanting to improve that version that you already love or really want to love, is more important than what society thinks about how i should love myself

> Some, no matter how good conditions might be, might never be content, never enjoy, because their mental condition is poor. 

Well this is truth, I could say that I have many moments of weakness because they are not all, but there are moments when I cannot enjoy it and it is as if I were immersed in misery and I have tried logically and rationally to find an explanation and I reached a somewhat far-fetched conclusion and it is because maybe I'm not consistently doing what I really want to do, how I want to live, or because I haven't been able to bring about the change I need and it's like I'm discouraged by default.

Of course I live trying to take steps, even small ones, to transform what I have.