<center> ![umuk.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbodkwxygxS6xayqffKf3EZAp5HLaPrbYZTGZNa1HzV96/umuk.jpg) ### Diesen Stammtisch kann kein Regime verbieten #### Zu einer Stammtischrunde gehört neben Bier und anderen alkoholischen Getränken, wie beispielsweise Wein, auch der eine oder andere Witz! <b> Genau um diese - für jede Kneipe elementaren Dinge - soll es hier gehen! <p> Erzählt in einem Kommentar euren Lieblingswitz und lasst euch mit reichlich BEER , PIZZA oder LOL belohnen! <p> Als bester Witzeerzähler darf sich der feiern lassen, der die meisten entsprechenden Calls erhalten konnte! <p> <sub><sub><b>Die Aufrufe die für den Wirt getätigt werden zählen selbstverständlich nicht für den Wettbewerb!</b> :-)</sub></sub> <p> <br> # SATIRE <br> <><><><><><><> <p> <br> umuk beteiligt sich mit seinen Fundstücken - außerhalb des Wettbewerbs: <p> <br> <> <p> ## NETZFUNDE <p> <p> <> <p> ![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmVzPbix5K5Sg1UttGwc4XicScyn16N2AyMKfLDwPnJJnN/grafik.png) <> ![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmawzmX5Z857UzkYe5pdx8tZtjtnsT5TJQM9Jsoi4Pg3Nn/grafik.png) <> ![](https://images.ecency.com/DQmXKUuzUsUToreCdbWvjuXJnLMTqF5D1i9EsM97BSqTtgU/grafik.png) <><><><><><><><> <sub><sub>***Je höher die Votepower, umso höher die Upvotes und auch die Kuration! Die Kuration wiederum erhöht - durch die Steigerung der HP - die Votepower von umuk. Also ein Kreislauf, der umuk immer stärker werden lässt!***</sub</sub> <p> <sub><sub>Überschüssige Votepower wird zum Kuratieren verwendet, hier werden dann ausgewählte Beiträge gevotet, um nicht auf die Kurations-Belohnung verzichten zu müssen.</sub></sub> </b> </center>
author | umuk |
---|---|
permlink | umuk-und-sein-witze-stammtisch-e09138d43f1e6 |
category | deutsch |
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created | 2022-11-26 14:32:09 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 14:32:09 |
depth | 0 |
children | 9 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 14:32:09 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.620 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.610 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 1,819 |
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root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,631,098 |
net_rshares | 2,536,950,275,560 |
author_curate_reward | "" |
voter | weight | wgt% | rshares | pct | time |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
miketr | 0 | 195,777,839,898 | 80% | ||
felix.herrmann | 0 | 19,660,496,503 | 30% | ||
leontr | 0 | 2,944,901,678 | 40% | ||
pixelfan | 0 | 46,702,945,237 | 5.5% | ||
flamo | 0 | 636,664,524 | 20% | ||
quekery | 0 | 13,316,291,967 | 9% | ||
smooms | 0 | 10,159,092,708 | 7.2% | ||
johnboywalton | 0 | 30,481,014,865 | 52% | ||
udabeu | 0 | 17,610,636,876 | 55% | ||
investyourvote | 0 | 50,615,415,131 | 80% | ||
barmbo | 0 | 23,116,325,631 | 100% | ||
kirstin | 0 | 62,621,670,605 | 100% | ||
sbi6 | 0 | 52,038,543,913 | 6.28% | ||
rich.art.deluxe | 0 | 2,086,237,093 | 60% | ||
ynwa.andree | 0 | 4,483,099,634 | 4.5% | ||
alucian | 0 | 30,356,758 | 100% | ||
berthold | 0 | 12,991,950,455 | 40% | ||
babschnae | 0 | 264,198,104,785 | 100% | ||
kryptodenno | 0 | 153,311,455,728 | 5% | ||
investinthefutur | 0 | 90,402,316,765 | 80% | ||
augustimo | 0 | 1,179,196,314 | 20% | ||
tokenindustry | 0 | 2,670,315,563 | 54.45% | ||
tingtong | 0 | 2,197,258,262 | 60% | ||
wilbur-walsh | 0 | 2,179,816,423 | 60% | ||
matt-kirby | 0 | 2,200,339,105 | 60% | ||
voinvote | 0 | 125,170,024,822 | 80% | ||
lotto-de | 0 | 101,637,349,847 | 80% | ||
levi-miron | 0 | 44,052,452,601 | 100% | ||
starthilfe | 0 | 875,001,474,207 | 60% | ||
thehockeyfan-at | 0 | 123,947,510,774 | 30% | ||
hiq | 0 | 51,118,685,171 | 9% | ||
carmate | 0 | 1,050,429,369 | 9% | ||
patriamcaritatis | 0 | 619,169,656 | 9% | ||
damus-nostra | 0 | 5,352,624,613 | 9% | ||
abenteurer-dan | 0 | 495,528,038 | 9% | ||
der-bierokrat | 0 | 615,881,365 | 20% | ||
hiq.redaktion | 0 | 3,575,715,905 | 9% | ||
bubblegif | 0 | 71,120,412,185 | 100% | ||
beebay | 0 | 1,523,962,766 | 20% | ||
clau-de-sign | 0 | 1,699,545,344 | 30% | ||
smoomslive | 0 | 671,182,889 | 20% | ||
r0nny | 0 | 8,748,935,809 | 9% | ||
shinpurple | 0 | 1,299,299,681 | 30% | ||
hiq.magazine | 0 | 962,564,373 | 9% | ||
queker-bee | 0 | 668,025,589 | 20% | ||
mary-be | 0 | 668,014,705 | 20% | ||
damus-nostra-2 | 0 | 670,384,359 | 20% | ||
adventkalender | 0 | 2,974,208,180 | 50% | ||
burn950 | 0 | 10,618,062,088 | 100% | ||
queensativa | 0 | 505,284,418 | 20% | ||
fnvdesigns | 0 | 1,317,337,267 | 100% | ||
hive-180580 | 0 | 3,308,578,664 | 100% | ||
kaeltegott | 0 | 774,354,445 | 100% | ||
splinterskins | 0 | 680,640,687 | 20% | ||
cryptocompany | 0 | 13,169,207,989 | 11.83% | ||
hiq.witness | 0 | 2,377,069,718 | 9% | ||
slicense | 0 | 2,077,237,257 | 80% | ||
blackmedschn | 0 | 10,458,830,094 | 47.91% | ||
hiq.smartbot | 0 | 1,523,823,801 | 9% | ||
hiq.hive | 0 | 1,744,437,318 | 9% | ||
hiq.bee | 0 | 179,211,211 | 20% | ||
hiq.fun | 0 | 149,820,482 | 23.67% | ||
hiq.pimp | 0 | 51,555,889 | 12.31% | ||
hiq.oneup | 0 | 759,155,563 | 93.69% |
!WITZ
author | burn950 |
---|---|
permlink | re-umuk-20221126t17316389z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | {"tags":["deutsch","proofofbrain","hive-engine","fun","pimp","waivio","vyb","oneup","tribes","trude"],"app":"ecency/3.0.29-vision","format":"markdown+html"} |
created | 2022-11-26 16:03:15 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 16:03:15 |
depth | 1 |
children | 1 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 16:03:15 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 5 |
author_reputation | 32,789,662,837,569 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,632,819 |
net_rshares | 0 |
<div class='pull-right'><center><img src="https://lolztoken.com/lolz.png"><br><a href="https://lolztoken.com">lolztoken.com</a></p><br><br><br><br></center></div><p><center><strong>Was macht ein Pirat am Computer?<br>Er drückt die Enter-Taste. </strong><br><sub>Credit: <a href="https://peakd.com/@werkseber">werkseber</a></sub><br>@umuk, ich habe dir im Namen von @burn950 einen <a href="https://hive-engine.com/?p=market&t=LOLZ">$LOLZ</a> Token gesendet<br>Verwende den Befehl <strong>!WITZ</strong> oder <strong>!LOOL</strong>, um einen Witz und ein <a href="https://hive-engine.com/?p=market&t=LOLZ">$LOLZ</a> zu teilen.<br><br>Delegate Hive Tokens to Farm $LOLZ and earn 110% Rewards. <a href='https://peakd.com/@lolztoken/introducing-lolz-defi-now-you'>Learn more.</a><br>.(3/4)</center></p>
author | lolzbot |
---|---|
permlink | re-re-umuk-20221126t17316389z-20221126t160405z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | "{"app": "beem/0.24.19"}" |
created | 2022-11-26 16:04:09 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 16:04:09 |
depth | 2 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 16:04:09 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 799 |
author_reputation | 109,181,078,987,999 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,632,838 |
net_rshares | 0 |
<div class="pull-left"> <img src="https://i.imgur.com/VDg3S7W.gif"></a> </div> <div class="pull-right"> @umuk, the HiQ Smart Bot has recognized your request (4/4) and will start the voting trail. In addition, @umuk gets !PIZZA from @hiq.redaktion. ![](https://i.imgur.com/plMUJVK.png) <sub>For further questions, check out https://hiq-hive.com or join our [Discord](https://discord.gg/25Fp5wBvQa). And don't forget to vote [HiQs fucking Witness!](https://vote.hive.uno/@hiq.witness) 😻</sub> </div>
author | hiq.smartbot |
---|---|
permlink | re-umuk-und-sein-witze-stammtisch-e09138d43f1e6-20221126t144014z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | "{"app": "beem/0.24.26"}" |
created | 2022-11-26 14:40:15 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 14:40:15 |
depth | 1 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 14:40:15 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 505 |
author_reputation | 2,908,322,769,009 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,631,214 |
net_rshares | 0 |
@kirstin denkt du hast ein Vote durch @investinthefutur verdient!<br>@kirstin thinks you have earned a vote of @investinthefutur !<br>
author | investinthefutur |
---|---|
permlink | re-umuk-und-sein-witze-stammtisch-e09138d43f1e6-20221126t163907z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | "{"app": "beem/0.24.26"}" |
created | 2022-11-26 16:39:06 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 16:39:06 |
depth | 1 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 16:39:06 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 134 |
author_reputation | 135,582,340,662,024 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,633,470 |
net_rshares | 0 |
Ein Deutscher sitzt gerade beim Frühstück, als sich ein Kaugummi kauender Holländer neben ihn setzt: “ Esst ihr Deutschen eigentlich das ganze Brot?“ Der Deutsche lässt sich nur widerwillig von seinem Frühstück ablenken und erwidert einsilbig: „Ja.“ Der Holländer formt eine Riesenblase mit seinem Kaugummi und meint: „Wir nicht, bei uns in Holland essen wir nur das Innere des Brotes. Die Brotrinden werden in Containern gesammelt, aufbereitet, in Croissants geformt und nach Deutschland verkauft.“ Der Deutsche hört schweigend zu. Der Niederländer lächelt verschmitzt und fragt: „Esst ihr auch Marmelade zum Brot?“ Der Deutsche erwidert leicht genervt: „Ja.“ Laut mit seinem Kaugummi schmatzend erwidert der Holländer: „Wir nicht. Bei uns in den Niederlanden essen wir nur frisches Obst zum Frühstück. Die Schalen, Samen und Überreste werden in Containern gesammelt, aufbereitet, zu Marmelade verarbeitet und nach Deutschland verkauft.“ Schließlich fragt der Deutsche: “ Habt ihr auch Sex in Holland?“ Der Holländer lacht und sagt: „Ja, natürlich haben wir Sex.“ Der Deutsche lehnt sich über den Tisch und fragt: “ Und was macht ihr hinterher mit den Kondomen?“ „Die werfen wir weg“, meint der Holländer. „Wir nicht“, lächelt der Deutsche, „in Deutschland werden alle Kondome in Containern gesammelt, geschmolzen, zu Kaugummi verarbeitet und nach Holland verkauft!“ !invest_vote
author | kirstin |
---|---|
permlink | re-umuk-20221126t173854460z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | {"tags":["deutsch","proofofbrain","hive-engine","fun","pimp","waivio","vyb","oneup","tribes","trude"],"app":"ecency/3.0.29-vision","format":"markdown+html"} |
created | 2022-11-26 16:38:54 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 16:38:54 |
depth | 1 |
children | 3 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 16:38:54 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.018 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.018 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 1,384 |
author_reputation | 355,339,655,241,922 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,633,465 |
net_rshares | 77,610,844,758 |
author_curate_reward | "" |
voter | weight | wgt% | rshares | pct | time |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
voinvote | 0 | 77,610,844,758 | 50% |
@levi-miron denkt du hast ein Vote durch @investinthefutur verdient!<br>@levi-miron thinks you have earned a vote of @investinthefutur !<br>
author | investinthefutur |
---|---|
permlink | re-re-umuk-20221126t173854460z-20221126t185754z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | "{"app": "beem/0.24.26"}" |
created | 2022-11-26 18:57:54 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 18:57:54 |
depth | 2 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 18:57:54 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 140 |
author_reputation | 135,582,340,662,024 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,636,322 |
net_rshares | 0 |
!PGM !invest_vote
author | levi-miron |
---|---|
permlink | re-kirstin-20221126t195740110z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | {"tags":["deutsch","proofofbrain","hive-engine","fun","pimp","waivio","vyb","oneup","tribes","trude"],"app":"ecency/3.0.29-vision","format":"markdown+html"} |
created | 2022-11-26 18:57:39 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 18:57:39 |
depth | 2 |
children | 1 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 18:57:39 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 22 |
author_reputation | 93,201,880,732,903 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,636,311 |
net_rshares | 0 |
<center>Sent 0.1 PGM - 0.1 LVL- 1 STARBITS - 0.05 DEC - 15 SBT - 0.1 THG - tokens to @levi-miron</center> <center><sub>remaining commands 0</sub></center> **BUY AND STAKE THE PGM TO SEND A LOT OF TOKENS!** The tokens that the command sends are: 0.1 PGM-0.1 LVL-0.1 THGAMING-0.05 DEC-15 SBT-1 STARBITS-[0.00000001 BTC (SWAP.BTC) only if you have 2500 PGM in stake or more ] 5000 PGM IN STAKE = 2x rewards! ![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/zottone444/23t7AyKqAfdxKEJPQrpePMW15BCPhbyrf5VoHWxhBFcEcPLjDUVVQAh9ZAopbmoJDekS6.png) Discord [![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/hive-135941/23wfr3mtLS9ddSpifBvh7mwLx1rN3eoaSvbwUxTngsNR1GQ8EiZTrC9P9RwZxHCCfK8e5.png)](https://discord.gg/KCvuNTEjWw) Support the curation account @ pgm-curator with a delegation [10 HP](https://hivesigner.com/sign/op/WyJkZWxlZ2F0ZV92ZXN0aW5nX3NoYXJlcyIseyJkZWxlZ2F0b3IiOiJfX3NpZ25lciIsImRlbGVnYXRlZSI6InBnbS1jdXJhdG9yIiwidmVzdGluZ19zaGFyZXMiOiIxMCJ9XQ..) - [50 HP](https://hivesigner.com/sign/op/WyJkZWxlZ2F0ZV92ZXN0aW5nX3NoYXJlcyIseyJkZWxlZ2F0b3IiOiJfX3NpZ25lciIsImRlbGVnYXRlZSI6InBnbS1jdXJhdG9yIiwidmVzdGluZ19zaGFyZXMiOiI1MCJ9XQ..) - [100 HP](https://hivesigner.com/sign/op/WyJkZWxlZ2F0ZV92ZXN0aW5nX3NoYXJlcyIseyJkZWxlZ2F0b3IiOiJfX3NpZ25lciIsImRlbGVnYXRlZSI6InBnbS1jdXJhb3RyIiwidmVzdGluZ19zaGFyZXMiOiIxMDAifV0.) - [500 HP](https://hivesigner.com/sign/op/WyJkZWxlZ2F0ZV92ZXN0aW5nX3NoYXJlcyIseyJkZWxlZ2F0b3IiOiJfX3NpZ25lciIsImRlbGVnYXRlZSI6InBnbS1jdXJhdG9yIiwidmVzdGluZ19zaGFyZXMiOiI1MDAifV0.) - [1000 HP](https://hivesigner.com/sign/op/WyJ0cmFuc2Zlcl90b192ZXN0aW5nIix7ImZyb20iOiJfX3NpZ25lciIsInRvIjoicGdtLWN1cmF0b3IiLCJhbW91bnQiOiIxMDAwIn1d) Get **potential** votes from @ pgm-curator by paying in PGM, here is a [guide](https://peakd.com/hive-146620/@zottone444/pay-1-pgm-and-get-4-votes-itaegn) <sub>I'm a bot, if you want a hand ask @ zottone444</sub> ***
author | pgm-curator |
---|---|
permlink | pgm-curatorlevi-miron1669489076174 |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | {"tags":[],"app":"pgm/0.1","format":"markdown+html"} |
created | 2022-11-26 18:57:57 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 18:57:57 |
depth | 3 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 18:57:57 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 1,883 |
author_reputation | 3,409,490,822,394 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,636,323 |
net_rshares | 0 |
Warum sollte man den Kühlschrank immer leise aufmachen? – Weil der Orangensaft konzentriert ist. !hiqvote
author | umuk |
---|---|
permlink | re-umuk-20221126t15404864z |
category | deutsch |
json_metadata | {"tags":["deutsch","proofofbrain","hive-engine","fun","pimp","waivio","vyb","oneup","tribes","trude"],"app":"ecency/3.0.29-vision","format":"markdown+html"} |
created | 2022-11-26 14:40:03 |
last_update | 2022-11-26 14:40:03 |
depth | 1 |
children | 0 |
last_payout | 2022-12-03 14:40:03 |
cashout_time | 1969-12-31 23:59:59 |
total_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
curator_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
pending_payout_value | 0.000 HBD |
promoted | 0.000 HBD |
body_length | 108 |
author_reputation | 77,931,124,664,412 |
root_title | "umuk - und sein Witze-Stammtisch" |
beneficiaries | [] |
max_accepted_payout | 1,000,000.000 HBD |
percent_hbd | 10,000 |
post_id | 118,631,210 |
net_rshares | 0 |